10-26-2005
| #1 |
| Enjoy In Moderation     Join Date: May 2005 Location: blair Age: 35
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| kinda funny ONLY IN AMERICA: Only in America.....do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. ! Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering. EVER WONDER .... Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?! Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? |
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10-26-2005
| #2 |
| Olivia Munn is F***ing HOT!!   Listens: Z92 - 3rd Shift Replay Join Date: May 2005 Location: Bellevue, NE Age: 25
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| Re:kinda funny *Brain slowly starts to fry*
__________________ "And don't even think about trying to steal it. 'cause we're gonna frisk you......Everywhere." |
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10-27-2005
| #3 |
| Drugs Are Better Than Pugs - Just Say No   Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36
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| Re:kinda funny ^:laugh: Fry hell,Mine exploded about halfway through.;) B)
__________________ "A 'madame' ain't nothing but a hooker with higher aspirations."- Craig Evans |
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10-27-2005
| #4 |
| The Great MorNon Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38
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| Re:kinda funny Very thought provoking...and mind-numbing ;) Thanks, 3M! |
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10-27-2005
| #5 | |
| Olivia Munn is F***ing HOT!! Listens: Z92 - 3rd Shift Replay Join Date: May 2005 Location: Bellevue, NE Age: 25
Posts: 5,422
Throcks: 772.93 Thanks: 3
Thanked 114 Times in 31 Posts
| Re:kinda funny mike wrote: Quote:
__________________ "And don't even think about trying to steal it. 'cause we're gonna frisk you......Everywhere." | |
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10-28-2005
| #6 |
| Always riding the ragged edge of disaster.  Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38
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| Re:kinda funny 'Duct' tape.... Want some? Sorry MMM, but it should read 'Only on Earth'.. for most of those... People in general are stoopid. :P
__________________ Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.  |
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10-28-2005
| #7 | |
| Olivia Munn is F***ing HOT!! Listens: Z92 - 3rd Shift Replay Join Date: May 2005 Location: Bellevue, NE Age: 25
Posts: 5,422
Throcks: 772.93 Thanks: 3
Thanked 114 Times in 31 Posts
| Re:kinda funny thender wrote: Quote:
__________________ "And don't even think about trying to steal it. 'cause we're gonna frisk you......Everywhere." | |
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