04-02-2006
| #1 |
| MMMMMMM......BBQ    Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: THE UNIQUE CITY OF BELLEVUE Age: 31
Posts: 2,163
 | Don't Fart in Bed This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting Loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water And make her gasp for air. Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because It was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was Perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that One day he would blow his guts out.The years went by and he continued to rip them out! Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for Dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had Put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts And a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep And, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic Waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into His shorts. Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting Which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic Footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control Herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After Years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his Bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her Lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, "Honey, you were right." "All these years you have warned me And I didn't listen to you." "What do you mean?" asked his wife. "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts Out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline and two fingers, I think I got Most of them back in."
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04-02-2006
| #2 |
| Drugs Are Better Than Pugs - Just Say No  Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36
Posts: 12,691
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed  Story of your life,josh? 
__________________ "Black Tony isn't salty, he's creamy"- Travis Justice |
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04-02-2006
| #3 |
| MMMMMMM......BBQ Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: THE UNIQUE CITY OF BELLEVUE Age: 31
Posts: 2,163
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed when were you there? 
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04-02-2006
| #4 |
| 1-800-BETS-OFF  Listens: Podcast Join Date: May 2005 Age: 21
Posts: 3,480
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed Praise be to God, then, I guess... That's funny in a sick, twisted way--IMO, one of the best ways 
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04-02-2006
| #5 |
| Unofficial TNT Contributor   Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Ashland - well by Ashland Age: 40
Posts: 190
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed eeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
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04-02-2006
| #6 |
| Sith Chef  Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Location: CBIA Age: 38
Posts: 5,813
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed A little yucky yet amusing...thanks josh! |
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04-02-2006
| #7 |
| Frotch Central  Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 325
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed all im gonna say is buuuuh(shudders)
__________________ "I am in earnest; I will not equivocate; I will not excuse; I will not retreat a single inch; and I will be heard." William Lloyd Garrison |
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04-03-2006
| #8 |
| Olivia Munn is F***ing HOT!!  Listens: Z92 - 3rd Shift Replay Join Date: May 2005 Location: Bellevue, NE Age: 25
Posts: 5,211
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed That was sick.
__________________ "And don't even think about stealing it. 'cause we're gonna frisk you......Everywhere." |
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04-04-2006
| #9 |
| The stickiest of the ickiest  Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 26
Posts: 462
 | Re: Don't Fart in Bed It's too early for me to be reading something that nasty. Actually, I never want to read something that nasty!
__________________ Morality is doing what is right no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told no matter what is right |
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04-05-2006
| #10 |
| Yes.... I'm still a Redneck!  Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Seward, NE Age: 32
Posts: 1,065
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed That was funny. 
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04-07-2006
| #11 |
| Goes down smooth.  Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Omaha Age: 23
Posts: 454
| Re: Don't Fart in Bed So would it be safe to say that its not the first time he's going to be stuffed with turkey that day? |
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