07-03-2006
| #1 |
| Special Members    Listens: Podcast Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 28
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| Military retirement bonus AN old one but still worth a laugh Military Retirement Bonus (If this doesn't make you laugh, you are truly humour Impaired!) The Navy found they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officer got to choose what those two points would be. The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000. The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked out with $96,000. The third one was a non-commissioned officer, a grizzly old Chief who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, "From the tip of my weenie to my testicles." It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider, explaining about the nice big checks the previous two officers had received. But the old Chief insisted and they decided to go along with him providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer. The medical officer arrived and instructed the Chief to "drop 'em," which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Chief's weenie and began to work back. Dear Lord!" he suddenly exclaimed, "Where are your testicles?" The old Chief calmly replied, "Vietnam."
__________________ "Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance." --Sam Brown |
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07-03-2006
| #2 |
| Always riding the ragged edge of disaster.   Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38
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| Re: Military retirement bonus I love that joke! It has always been a good one!!!! 
__________________ Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.  |
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07-03-2006
| #3 |
| TnTU Guru Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38
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| Re: Military retirement bonus  |
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07-04-2006
| #4 |
| 1-800-BETS-OFF  Listens: Podcast Join Date: May 2005 Age: 21
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| Re: Military retirement bonus Very funny 
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07-04-2006
| #5 |
| Drugs Are Better Than Pugs - Just Say No  Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36
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| Re: Military retirement bonus Classic!! 
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