Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

**Bud** · 07-31-2006

A young boy is standing on a street corner swatting flies. Everytime he sees a fly he utters, "fucking flies, fucking flies."

Just as the boy says it a shocked priest walks up and says, "You should not curse the flies because every one of God's creations has a purpose."

The little boy, unmoved by the priest's objection says, "bullshit."

"Well tell me 3 things on this earth that God has made without a cause" says the priest.

The boy looks at him with a grin and replies, "Tits on a nun, balls on a priest, and these fucking flies."

**Thender** · 07-31-2006

**Bud** · 08-01-2006

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult four hour, surgical procedure. A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath

Nurse", he mumbles, from behind the mask. "Are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."

He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, are my testicles black?"

Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around.

Then, she takes a close look and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir!!"

The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but listen very, very closely......

A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s - b a c k ?

**Thender** · 08-01-2006

**ob1** · 08-01-2006

Nice ones Bud!

**Bud** · 08-01-2006

Glad you enjoy. You will find I have a screwed up sense of humor.

Al · 08-02-2006

those are pretty funny...

josh · 08-02-2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bud8Fan

Glad you enjoy. You will find I have a screwed up sense of humor.

then you will get along fine here.

jpa · 08-02-2006

07-31-2006	#1
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 10,304 Throcks: 6,000.63 Thanks: 112 Thanked 133 Times in 58 Posts	Rated R Joke A young boy is standing on a street corner swatting flies. Everytime he sees a fly he utters, "fucking flies, fucking flies." Just as the boy says it a shocked priest walks up and says, "You should not curse the flies because every one of God's creations has a purpose." The little boy, unmoved by the priest's objection says, "bullshit." "Well tell me 3 things on this earth that God has made without a cause" says the priest. The boy looks at him with a grin and replies, "Tits on a nun, balls on a priest, and these fucking flies." __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!!

07-31-2006	#2
Thender Always riding the ragged edge of disaster. Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 19,313 Throcks: 1,797.29 Thanks: 666 Thanked 538 Times in 209 Posts	Re: Rated R Joke __________________ Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.

08-01-2006	#3
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 10,304 Throcks: 6,000.63 Thanks: 112 Thanked 133 Times in 58 Posts	Re: Rated R Joke A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult four hour, surgical procedure. A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath Nurse", he mumbles, from behind the mask. "Are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet." He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, are my testicles black?" Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around. Then, she takes a close look and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir!!" The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but listen very, very closely...... A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s - b a c k ? __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!! Last edited by Bud; 08-01-2006 at 01:31 PM.

08-01-2006	#4
Thender Always riding the ragged edge of disaster. Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 19,313 Throcks: 1,797.29 Thanks: 666 Thanked 538 Times in 209 Posts	Re: Rated R Joke __________________ Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.

08-01-2006	#5
ob1 TnTU Guru Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 6,118 Throcks: 430.68 Thanks: 643 Thanked 142 Times in 55 Posts	Re: Rated R Joke Nice ones Bud!

08-01-2006	#6
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 10,304 Throcks: 6,000.63 Thanks: 112 Thanked 133 Times in 58 Posts	Re: Rated R Joke Glad you enjoy. You will find I have a screwed up sense of humor. __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!!

08-02-2006	#7
Al TnTU's Official "JETTHEAD" Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 46 Posts: 430 Throcks: 267.10 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Rated R Joke those are pretty funny...

08-02-2006	#9
jpa Special Members Listens: Podcast Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 28 Posts: 6,163 Throcks: 410.30 Thanks: 5 Thanked 71 Times in 21 Posts	Re: Rated R Joke __________________ "Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance." --Sam Brown

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