Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Dave · 10-25-2006

Not too original, but somebody asked me to post it because they thought it was hilarious....

anyhoo...

---------
Mattel recently announced the release of Limited Edition Barbie Dolls for
the Omaha, Nebraska market...

West Omaha Barbie:
This princess Barbie is only sold at Village Point. She comes
with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired
foreign dog named Honey and a cookie cutter house. Available with or
withouttummy tuck and face-lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with
"augmented" version.

Millard Barbie:
This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan
and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time
occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell phone soldseparately.

North Omaha Barbie:
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife,
a Chevy with dark tinted windows and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only
available after dark and can only be paid for in cash-preferably small,
untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what
you are talking about.

Bennington Barbie:
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or
Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country
club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private
School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

Council Bluffs Barbie:
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too
small, a NASCAR shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a
six pack of Coors light and a Hank Williams , Jr. CD set. She can spit
over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when he's drunk. Purchase
her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker
absolutely free.

Regency Barbie:
This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears undergarments from
Borsheims and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at Garat's.
Percocet prescription available.

Benson Barbie:
This tobacco chewing, brassy haired Barbie has a pair of her own
high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased
Beer-Gutted Ken out of Council Bluff's Barbie's house. Her
ensemble includes low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see
through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.

Dundee Barbie:
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair,
archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks.
She prefers that you call her "Willow." She does not
want or need a Ken doll, but you if purchase two Dundee Barbies and the
optional
Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag sticker for free.

Bellevue Barbie:
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional
accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy were
available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

Elkhorn Barbie:
She's perfect in every way. We don't know who Ken is because he's always
hunting.

South Omaha Barbie:
This Spanish Speaking only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota with expired
temporary plates and three baby Barbies in the back seat, but no car
seats. The optional Ken doll comes with a Meat Packers uniform and is
missing three fingers on his left hand. Green Cards are not available for
Barbie or Ken.

**Thender** · 10-25-2006

Somebody had a lot of time on their hands.....

josh · 10-25-2006

it's funny every time i read it.

KUfan_Donnie · 10-25-2006

Nice read, Dave...

jpa · 10-26-2006

i still enjoy seeing that, this was also posted in similar form on 3/21 in this thread: Limited Edition Barbie Dolls for the Omaha, Nebraska Market

KUfan_Donnie · 10-26-2006

Must've been why Dave didn't think it was too original...I thought I had seen something like it before

Whatever, still funny

**Bud** · 10-26-2006

That's funny.

Dave · 10-26-2006

Quote:

Must've been why Dave didn't think it was too original...I thought I had seen something like it before

Yeah, I thought it had a familiar ring to this site before!

Lynniebits · 10-26-2006

I don't care what you say, that Council Bluffs Barbie is mine. They forgot to add that you could find it at any Wal-Mart, and that the jeans probably have a hole in them somewhere.

KUfan_Donnie · 10-26-2006

^Trucker hat sold separately?

Lynniebits · 10-26-2006

Yeah that comes in the extra pack that contains the contents for the truck too. That is 2 broken baby seats (babies and baby daddies not included) numerous empty McDonald's wrappers for the back seat, a full cigarette ashtray for the arm of the couch in the trailor home, and several stinky diapers.

KUfan_Donnie · 10-26-2006

Well I'm not buying it unless I can get the limited edition deluxe version...the entire set with bonus pet pitbull

deutsch1979 · 10-28-2006

I loved this!

Millard Barbie was too similar for my liking.

10-25-2006	#1
Dave Wookin Pa Nub Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jun 2004 Age: 38 Posts: 5,223 Throcks: 2,971.47 Thanks: 555 Thanked 620 Times in 143 Posts	West Omaha Barbie Not too original, but somebody asked me to post it because they thought it was hilarious.... anyhoo... --------- Mattel recently announced the release of Limited Edition Barbie Dolls for the Omaha, Nebraska market... West Omaha Barbie: This princess Barbie is only sold at Village Point. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a cookie cutter house. Available with or withouttummy tuck and face-lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version. Millard Barbie: This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell phone soldseparately. North Omaha Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash-preferably small, untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about. Bennington Barbie: This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them. Council Bluffs Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six pack of Coors light and a Hank Williams , Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when he's drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free. Regency Barbie: This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears undergarments from Borsheims and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at Garat's. Percocet prescription available. Benson Barbie: This tobacco chewing, brassy haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-Gutted Ken out of Council Bluff's Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home. Dundee Barbie: This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her "Willow." She does not want or need a Ken doll, but you if purchase two Dundee Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag sticker for free. Bellevue Barbie: This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant. Elkhorn Barbie: She's perfect in every way. We don't know who Ken is because he's always hunting. South Omaha Barbie: This Spanish Speaking only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota with expired temporary plates and three baby Barbies in the back seat, but no car seats. The optional Ken doll comes with a Meat Packers uniform and is missing three fingers on his left hand. Green Cards are not available for Barbie or Ken. __________________ Todd and Tyler Streaming Questions, comments, concerns? Contact the Empire

10-25-2006	#2
Thender Always riding the ragged edge of disaster. Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 20,285 Throcks: 3,635.43 Thanks: 4,163 Thanked 4,408 Times in 1,181 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie Somebody had a lot of time on their hands..... __________________ Shenandoah, American Legion Post #88 Color Guard, State Color Guard Champions for 2008 - 2009 Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.

10-25-2006	#3
josh MMMMMMM......BBQ Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: THE UNIQUE CITY OF BELLEVUE Age: 31 Posts: 2,268 Throcks: 21.34 Thanks: 393 Thanked 288 Times in 57 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie it's funny every time i read it. __________________ THIS SPACE FOR RENT.

10-25-2006	#4
KUfan_Donnie 1-800-BETS-OFF Listens: Podcast Join Date: May 2005 Age: 21 Posts: 3,480 Throcks: 332.24 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie Nice read, Dave... __________________ One weekend survived

10-26-2006	#5
jpa Special Members Listens: Podcast Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 28 Posts: 6,392 Throcks: 743.46 Thanks: 27 Thanked 1,157 Times in 250 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie i still enjoy seeing that, this was also posted in similar form on 3/21 in this thread: Limited Edition Barbie Dolls for the Omaha, Nebraska Market __________________ "Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance." --Sam Brown

10-26-2006	#6
KUfan_Donnie 1-800-BETS-OFF Listens: Podcast Join Date: May 2005 Age: 21 Posts: 3,480 Throcks: 332.24 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie Must've been why Dave didn't think it was too original...I thought I had seen something like it before Whatever, still funny __________________ One weekend survived

10-26-2006	#7
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 11,154 Throcks: 11,219.69 Thanks: 3,684 Thanked 3,512 Times in 908 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie That's funny. __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!!

10-26-2006	#9
Lynniebits Fear me, if you dare! Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Back in Counciltucky! Age: 33 Posts: 2,126 Throcks: 337.26 Thanks: 0 Thanked 14 Times in 3 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie I don't care what you say, that Council Bluffs Barbie is mine. They forgot to add that you could find it at any Wal-Mart, and that the jeans probably have a hole in them somewhere. __________________ Life is too short for bras and uncomfortable shoes.

10-26-2006	#10
KUfan_Donnie 1-800-BETS-OFF Listens: Podcast Join Date: May 2005 Age: 21 Posts: 3,480 Throcks: 332.24 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie ^Trucker hat sold separately? __________________ One weekend survived

10-26-2006	#11
Lynniebits Fear me, if you dare! Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Back in Counciltucky! Age: 33 Posts: 2,126 Throcks: 337.26 Thanks: 0 Thanked 14 Times in 3 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie Yeah that comes in the extra pack that contains the contents for the truck too. That is 2 broken baby seats (babies and baby daddies not included) numerous empty McDonald's wrappers for the back seat, a full cigarette ashtray for the arm of the couch in the trailor home, and several stinky diapers. __________________ Life is too short for bras and uncomfortable shoes.

10-26-2006	#12
KUfan_Donnie 1-800-BETS-OFF Listens: Podcast Join Date: May 2005 Age: 21 Posts: 3,480 Throcks: 332.24 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie Well I'm not buying it unless I can get the limited edition deluxe version...the entire set with bonus pet pitbull __________________ One weekend survived

10-28-2006	#13
deutsch1979 TnTU Senior Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Gretna NE Age: 29 Posts: 289 Throcks: 227.93 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: West Omaha Barbie I loved this! Millard Barbie was too similar for my liking. __________________ Its pronounced DOYTCH!

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