Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

2ox · 04-18-2007

Women think they already know everything, but waittraining courses are now available for women on the following subjects:

1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before
2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits
3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits
4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait Till After The Game
5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too
6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His
7. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First
8. Communication Skills II : Thinking Before Speaking
9. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging
10. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire
11. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up
12. Introduction to Parking
13. Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space
14. Water Retention: Fact or Fat
15. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter
16. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption
17. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People
18. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully
19. PMS: Your ProblemNot His
20. Dancing: Why Men Dont Like To
21. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have
22. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice
23. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together
24. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both
25. TV Remotes: For Men Only

**Thender** · 04-18-2007

Nuff said

jpa · 04-19-2007

shouldnt parallel parking be with advance parking as well

KUfan_Donnie · 04-19-2007

I'm sure the TnTU ladies will enjoy this

**mike** · 04-19-2007

I can think of a couple of people who need this course.

**Bud** · 04-19-2007

LMAO !!!!

I'm sending this to my wife.

**ob1** · 04-19-2007

Great ones as always 'ox!

lilyvon schtupp · 04-19-2007

i just wanna point out that
women have cheaper auto insurance
because
WE ARE BETTER DRIVERS THAN MEN

**mike** · 04-19-2007

no, it because ladies flirt to get the smaller rates..

**Thender** · 04-19-2007

Better drivers? I have a feeling that statistic is falling as we speak because women can't drive without a fricking cell phone glued to their ear....

cruz · 04-19-2007

or with a make-up kit in one hand!

Megan · 04-19-2007

Here are the classes for men:

1. How to get off your lazy ass.
2. How to unclog the toilet and spray air freshener after the "deuce".
3. Replacing toilet paper.
4. They are your kids too! Play with them once and a while.
5. Hunting, fishing, Nascar and Golf are not real sports! And aren't that important!
6. Your farts only smell good to you.
7. Quiting to act like you know everything when the fix it guy has to fix your mistakes!
8. It is NOT your house. You just pay for it.
9. How to load and turn on the dishwasher.
10. Tread marks on your undies aren't presants for you girlfriend/wife. Learn how to wipe your ass!
11. Fix your own dam food!
12. Husbands should check oil and gas.
13. Taking out the trash.
14. The remote is yours only if I am not using it!!!!!!!!!

**Thender** · 04-19-2007

Quote:

Originally Posted by Megan

Here are the classes for men:

1. How to get off your lazy ass. Blow me! I'll work more around the house!

2. How to unclog the toilet and spray air freshener after the "deuce".Another farce!!! I'm always running the plunger up to the "girls" and DAMN!!! They leave worse stenches than the dog.....

3. Replacing toilet paper. Again, BULLSHIT!!!! I'm the only "guy" in this house that keeps bung fodder by the toilets....

4. They are your kids too! Play with them once and a while. I take them fishing, teach them baseball, teach them football, while they are taking dance lessons, tennis lessons, swim lessons.... What more do you want????

5. Hunting, fishing, Nascar and Golf are not real sports! And aren't that important! Don't f**k with hunting or fishing.... That's natural and fat free meat...

6. Your farts only smell good to you. You love 'em!!!

7. Quiting to act like you know everything when the fix it guy has to fix your mistakes! I do know it all! You just don't want to admit it!!!

8. It is NOT your house. You just pay for it. Now you are just getting cocky....

9. How to load and turn on the dishwasher. I've been trying to teach the wife how to do that for 6 years now....

10. Tread marks on your undies aren't presents for you girlfriend/wife. Learn how to wipe your ass! We release... Instead of cramping up because we don't lie about our bodily gasses...

11. Fix your own dam food! I am the COOK!

12. Husbands should check oil and gas. Wife's should tell their husbands when they hear a fricken strange noise!

13. Taking out the trash. I have never seen a woman do it yet....

14. The remote is yours only if I am not using it!!!!!!!!!Lets wrestle for it

jpa · 04-19-2007

nice rebuttle Thender

**Bud** · 04-20-2007

Ditto to Thender's entire list !!

I am the cook in our house also.

My wife couldn't boil a pot of water. Like Thender said, I'm still trying to teach her how to use the washer and dryer correctly. She didn't even know how to turn one on when she moved in. If it wasn't for me cleaning the lint trap the damn thing would have caught fire by now.

Her parents didn't teach her shit growing up, more reason to hate them.

PS. I love my wife. :)

harmany · 04-20-2007

Megan · 04-20-2007

Thender, sounds like I hit a nerve with you. I didn't mean you in particular just men in general.

You all love to make fun of us girls but you can't take it when we dish it out!

Oh BTW, you can't wrestle me cause I'd KICK YOUR ASS!!!!!!!!

Love ya!

**Thender** · 04-20-2007

No nerve hit here. And all I did was re-dish it back at ya...

Just having fun....

2ox · 04-21-2007

its always in good fun Megan. absolutely love the ladies on here!

04-18-2007	#1
2ox i see daves balls Listens: I don't listen Join Date: May 2005 Location: on the poor side of town Age: 44 Posts: 3,410 Throcks: 583.94 Thanks: 1 Thanked 67 Times in 19 Posts	Stirring The Pudding Women think they already know everything, but waittraining courses are now available for women on the following subjects: 1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before 2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits 3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits 4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait Till After The Game 5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too 6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His 7. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First 8. Communication Skills II : Thinking Before Speaking 9. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging 10. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire 11. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up 12. Introduction to Parking 13. Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space 14. Water Retention: Fact or Fat 15. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter 16. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption 17. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People 18. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully 19. PMS: Your ProblemNot His 20. Dancing: Why Men Dont Like To 21. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have 22. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice 23. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together 24. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both 25. TV Remotes: For Men Only __________________ "Sheep go to heaven, goats go to Daves"

04-18-2007	#2
Thender Always riding the ragged edge of disaster. Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 19,291 Throcks: 1,763.95 Thanks: 629 Thanked 469 Times in 183 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding Nuff said __________________ Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.

04-19-2007	#3
jpa Special Members Listens: Podcast Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 28 Posts: 6,161 Throcks: 407.20 Thanks: 5 Thanked 63 Times in 19 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding shouldnt parallel parking be with advance parking as well __________________ "Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance." --Sam Brown

04-19-2007	#4
KUfan_Donnie 1-800-BETS-OFF Listens: Podcast Join Date: May 2005 Age: 21 Posts: 3,480 Throcks: 266.46 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding I'm sure the TnTU ladies will enjoy this __________________ One weekend survived

04-19-2007	#5
mike Drugs Are Better Than Pugs - Just Say No Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36 Posts: 12,978 Throcks: 1,096.91 Thanks: 621 Thanked 139 Times in 62 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding I can think of a couple of people who need this course. __________________ "A 'madame' ain't nothing but a hooker with higher aspirations."- Craig Evans

04-19-2007	#6
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 10,304 Throcks: 5,969.61 Thanks: 112 Thanked 133 Times in 58 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding LMAO !!!! I'm sending this to my wife. __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!!

04-19-2007	#7
ob1 TnTU Guru Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 6,118 Throcks: 419.94 Thanks: 629 Thanked 138 Times in 55 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding Great ones as always 'ox!

04-19-2007	#8
lilyvon schtupp i ride the short bus because i'm Listens: I don't listen Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: counciltucky Posts: 1,382 Throcks: 845.60 Thanks: 6 Thanked 113 Times in 42 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding i just wanna point out that women have cheaper auto insurance because WE ARE BETTER DRIVERS THAN MEN __________________ "Radio should be stimulating people rather than actually killing them into a state of apathy, which I think has happened." -- Adam Clayton, 1992

04-19-2007	#9
mike Drugs Are Better Than Pugs - Just Say No Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36 Posts: 12,978 Throcks: 1,096.91 Thanks: 621 Thanked 139 Times in 62 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding no, it because ladies flirt to get the smaller rates.. __________________ "A 'madame' ain't nothing but a hooker with higher aspirations."- Craig Evans

04-19-2007	#10
Thender Always riding the ragged edge of disaster. Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 19,291 Throcks: 1,763.95 Thanks: 629 Thanked 469 Times in 183 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding Better drivers? I have a feeling that statistic is falling as we speak because women can't drive without a fricking cell phone glued to their ear.... __________________ Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.

04-19-2007	#11
cruz TnTU Grade School Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 5 Throcks: 162.03 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding or with a make-up kit in one hand!

04-19-2007	#12
Megan I love Trav Time! :) Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Location: Papillion, Nebraska Age: 36 Posts: 264 Throcks: 275.50 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding Here are the classes for men: 1. How to get off your lazy ass. 2. How to unclog the toilet and spray air freshener after the "deuce". 3. Replacing toilet paper. 4. They are your kids too! Play with them once and a while. 5. Hunting, fishing, Nascar and Golf are not real sports! And aren't that important! 6. Your farts only smell good to you. 7. Quiting to act like you know everything when the fix it guy has to fix your mistakes! 8. It is NOT your house. You just pay for it. 9. How to load and turn on the dishwasher. 10. Tread marks on your undies aren't presants for you girlfriend/wife. Learn how to wipe your ass! 11. Fix your own dam food! 12. Husbands should check oil and gas. 13. Taking out the trash. 14. The remote is yours only if I am not using it!!!!!!!!! __________________ Megan Jesus was a liberal.

04-19-2007	#14
jpa Special Members Listens: Podcast Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 28 Posts: 6,161 Throcks: 407.20 Thanks: 5 Thanked 63 Times in 19 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding nice rebuttle Thender __________________ "Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance." --Sam Brown

04-20-2007	#15
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 10,304 Throcks: 5,969.61 Thanks: 112 Thanked 133 Times in 58 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding Ditto to Thender's entire list !! I am the cook in our house also. My wife couldn't boil a pot of water. Like Thender said, I'm still trying to teach her how to use the washer and dryer correctly. She didn't even know how to turn one on when she moved in. If it wasn't for me cleaning the lint trap the damn thing would have caught fire by now. Her parents didn't teach her shit growing up, more reason to hate them. PS. I love my wife. :) __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!!

04-20-2007	#16
harmany TnTU College Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: papillion ne Age: 25 Posts: 529 Throcks: 199.12 Thanks: 0 Thanked 20 Times in 7 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding lol __________________ BIG XII NORTH CHAMPIONS GO TIGERS!!!

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04-20-2007	#17
Megan I love Trav Time! :) Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Location: Papillion, Nebraska Age: 36 Posts: 264 Throcks: 275.50 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding Thender, sounds like I hit a nerve with you. I didn't mean you in particular just men in general. You all love to make fun of us girls but you can't take it when we dish it out! Oh BTW, you can't wrestle me cause I'd KICK YOUR ASS!!!!!!!! Love ya! __________________ Megan Jesus was a liberal.

04-20-2007	#18
Thender Always riding the ragged edge of disaster. Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 19,291 Throcks: 1,763.95 Thanks: 629 Thanked 469 Times in 183 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding No nerve hit here. And all I did was re-dish it back at ya... Just having fun.... __________________ Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.

04-21-2007	#19
2ox i see daves balls Listens: I don't listen Join Date: May 2005 Location: on the poor side of town Age: 44 Posts: 3,410 Throcks: 583.94 Thanks: 1 Thanked 67 Times in 19 Posts	Re: Stirring The Pudding its always in good fun Megan. absolutely love the ladies on here! __________________ "Sheep go to heaven, goats go to Daves"