Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

HoJo34 · 07-03-2008

A man is in bed with his wife when there is a knock on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock -- it's half-past three in the morning. "I'm not getting out of bed at this time", he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. "Aren't you going to answer that?" says his wife. So, he drags himself out of bed and goes downstairs.
He opens the door and there is man standing at the door. It didn't take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk. "Hi there," slurs the stranger, "Can you give me a push?"
"No. Get lost, it's half-past three. I was in bed," says the man and slams the door.
He goes back up to bed and tells his wife what happened and she says "Dave, that wasn't very nice of you.
Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby-sitter and you had to knock on that man's door to get us started again? What would have happened if he'd told us to get lost?"
"But the guy was drunk," says the husband.
"It doesn't matter," says the wife. "He needs our help and it would be the Christian thing to help him."
So, the husband gets out of bed again, gets dressed and goes downstairs. He opens the door and, not being able to see the stranger anywhere he shouts: "Hey, do you still want a push?" and he hears a voice cry out "Yeah please."
So, still being unable to see the stranger, he shouts: "Where are you?"
And the stranger replies: "I'm over here, on your swing set."

**mike** · 07-03-2008

**Thender** · 07-03-2008

His name was Drac., wasn't it?

lilyvon schtupp · 07-03-2008

hahahaha!

**ob1** · 07-03-2008

2ox · 07-03-2008

OmahaMomma · 07-03-2008

I can't believe my nieghbor told on me

**dracula** · 07-03-2008

jpa · 07-06-2008

07-03-2008	#1
HoJo34 TnTU Sophomore Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 124 Throcks: 206.87 Thanks: 0 Thanked 37 Times in 11 Posts	Drunk A man is in bed with his wife when there is a knock on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock -- it's half-past three in the morning. "I'm not getting out of bed at this time", he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. "Aren't you going to answer that?" says his wife. So, he drags himself out of bed and goes downstairs. He opens the door and there is man standing at the door. It didn't take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk. "Hi there," slurs the stranger, "Can you give me a push?" "No. Get lost, it's half-past three. I was in bed," says the man and slams the door. He goes back up to bed and tells his wife what happened and she says "Dave, that wasn't very nice of you. Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby-sitter and you had to knock on that man's door to get us started again? What would have happened if he'd told us to get lost?" "But the guy was drunk," says the husband. "It doesn't matter," says the wife. "He needs our help and it would be the Christian thing to help him." So, the husband gets out of bed again, gets dressed and goes downstairs. He opens the door and, not being able to see the stranger anywhere he shouts: "Hey, do you still want a push?" and he hears a voice cry out "Yeah please." So, still being unable to see the stranger, he shouts: "Where are you?" And the stranger replies: "I'm over here, on your swing set."

07-03-2008	#2
mike BOOOOOOOOOOOOBIES!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36 Posts: 15,245 Throcks: 6,857.26 Thanks: 16,321 Thanked 9,639 Times in 2,231 Posts	Re: Drunk __________________ If I like you, leave a message. If I don't , don't bother. If I don't know you, why the hell you calling me ??

07-03-2008	#3
Thender Always riding the ragged edge of disaster. Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 24,107 Throcks: 9,386.43 Thanks: 14,833 Thanked 17,109 Times in 4,229 Posts	Re: Drunk His name was Drac., wasn't it? __________________ Shenandoah, American Legion Post #88 Color Guard, State Color Guard Champions for 2008 - 2009 Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.

07-03-2008	#4
lilyvon schtupp i ride the short bus because i'm Listens: I don't listen Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: counciltucky Posts: 1,729 Throcks: 2,726.20 Thanks: 72 Thanked 1,984 Times in 376 Posts	Re: Drunk hahahaha! __________________ "We will NOT allow you to blaspheme The Monkees on this show!"- Todd

07-03-2008	#5
ob1 Jedi SlaveBoy Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 7,205 Throcks: 2,747.10 Thanks: 1,356 Thanked 3,160 Times in 619 Posts	Re: Drunk

07-03-2008	#6
2ox it makes good good sense Listens: I don't listen Join Date: May 2005 Location: on the poor side of town Age: 45 Posts: 3,645 Throcks: 1,302.82 Thanks: 11 Thanked 611 Times in 128 Posts	Re: Drunk __________________ "I took a look inside your bedroom door...You looked so good lying on your bed...Well, I asked you if you wanted any rhythm and love...You said you wanna rock 'n' roll instead"

07-03-2008	#7
OmahaMomma One Hot Momma !!! Listens: Web Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 31 Posts: 919 Throcks: 554.71 Thanks: 313 Thanked 1,062 Times in 219 Posts	Re: Drunk I can't believe my nieghbor told on me __________________ OmahaMomma's Blog Page

07-03-2008	#8
dracula Your Mom hates you, she told me so.... Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Aug 2005 Age: 45 Posts: 5,444 Throcks: 80.46 Thanks: 10,424 Thanked 14,268 Times in 3,278 Posts	Re: Drunk __________________ I'm giving serious consideration...to eating your wife...Hannibal Lechter

07-06-2008	#9
jpa Special Members Listens: Podcast Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 28 Posts: 7,849 Throcks: 2,511.52 Thanks: 1,240 Thanked 5,607 Times in 1,156 Posts	Re: Drunk __________________ "Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance." --Sam Brown

Thread Tools	Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Email this Page	Search this Thread: Advanced Search
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode