Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

RyanB. · 04-25-2007

LEVEL 1: It's 11pm on a weeknight, you've had a few beers.

Just as you get up to leave because you have to work the next day, one of your friends buys another round -- one of your *unemployed* friends. Here, at level one, you think to yourself, "Oh come on, this is silly, as long as I get seven hours of sleep, I'll be fine."

LEVEL 2: It's midnight. You've had a few more beers.

You've just spent 20 minutes arguing against the use of artificial turf. You get up to leave again, but at level two, a little devil appears on your shoulder. And now you're thinking, "Hey! I'm out with my friends! What am I working for anyway? These are the good times! Besides, as long as I get five hours of sleep, I'm cool."

LEVEL 3: 1am. You've abandoned beer for tequila.

You've just spent 20 minutes arguing FOR the use of artificial turf. And now you're thinking, "Our waitress is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen!"

At level three, you love the world. On the way to the bathroom, you buy a drink for the stranger at the end of the bar just because you like his face. You get drinking fantasies (like, "Hey fellas, if we bought our own bar, we could live together forever. We could do it. Tommy, you could cook."). But at level three, that devil is a little bit bigger... and he's buying. And you're thinking, "Oh, come on, come on now. As long as I get three hours of sleep... and a complete change of blood, I'm cool."

LEVEL 4: 2am. And the devil is bartending.

For last call, you ordered a bottle of rum and a Coke. You ARE artificial turf!

This time, on your way to the bathroom, you punch the stranger at the end of the bar just because you don't like his face! And now you're thinking, "Our busboy is the best looking man I've ever seen." You and your friends decide to leave, right after you get thrown out, and one of you knows an afterhours bar.

Here, at level four, you actually think to yourself, "Well... as long as I'm only going to get a few hours sleep anyway, I may as well stay up all night! Yeah! That'd be good for me. I don't mind going to that board meeting looking like Keith Richards. Yeah, I'll turn that around, make it work for me. And besides, as long as I get 31 hours sleep tomorrow, I'm cool."

LEVEL 5: 5am.

After unsuccessfully trying to get your money back at the tattoo parlor ("But I don't even know anybody named Simon!"), you and your friends wind up across the state line in a bar with guys who have been in prison as recently as... that morning. It's the kind of place where even the devil is saying, "Uh, I gotta turn in. I gotta be in Hell by nine."

At this point, you're all drinking some kind of thick blue liquor, like something from a Klingon wedding. A waitress with fresh stitches comes over, and you think to yourself, "Someday I'm gonna marry that girl!" One of your friends stands up and screams, "WE'RE DRIVIN' TO VEGAS, BABY!!!!!" -- and passes out.

You crawl outside for air, and then you hit the worst part of level 5 -- the sun. You weren't expecting that were you? You never do. You walk out of a bar in daylight, and you see people on their way to work or worse, jogging. And they look at you and they know. And they say, "Who's Simon?" Let's be honest, if you're 19 and you stay up all night, it's like a victory -- you've beat the night. But if you're over 30, then that sun is like God's flashlight.

We all say the same prayer and then, "I swear, I will never do this again as long as I live!" And some of us have that little addition, "and this time, I mean it!"

**mike** · 04-25-2007

I am not even going to say anything.

**Bud** · 04-25-2007

Level 6:

"Hi, my name is Bob and I'm an alcholic."

deutsch1979 · 04-25-2007

How bad is it that everyone can agree that most of this is true? :)

**Bud** · 04-25-2007

My 20's were fun but I don't think I'd want to do them again.

I can relate to a lot of that.

**ob1** · 04-25-2007

I'm a jedi...I have never even had so much as a drop of an alcoholic beverage in my life.

**mike** · 04-25-2007

and jedi's are known as constant liars.

**ob1** · 04-25-2007

Quote:

Originally Posted by mike

and jedi's are known as constant liars.

sshhhhhh...keep it down mike...no one needs to know.

**Bud** · 04-25-2007

It's a secret ?

**Thender** · 04-25-2007

Been there, done that... But with no tattoo...

jpa · 04-25-2007

no comment

RyanB. · 04-25-2007

I have no tattoos either but I saw this and reminded me of alot of crazy stuff

Nazarah · 04-25-2007

Quote:

Originally Posted by RyanB.

Hey fellas, if we bought our own bar, we could live together forever. We could do it. Tommy, you could cook

I have a friend that I go out drinking with that get's on that type of stuff ALL THE TIME. He is all about opening a bar and tons of his friends working there......it actually get's kind of annoying.

deutsch1979 · 04-25-2007

Anyone been to Sharks Club here? A friend suggested going out there and I haven't heard of it before. For my bday, we traveled to Lincoln (needed a sitter) and every bar we went to, sucked.

I don't need a repeat of that night. I miss my hometown bars.

lilyvon schtupp · 04-26-2007

#1 i've never had to argue about artificial turf, drunk or sober, EVER
#2 what board meeting? i don't think i'll be missed at that sorry ass retail job
#3 i know who "simon" is

**mike** · 04-27-2007

Lily, then your better than the rest of us!!

lilyvon schtupp · 04-27-2007

of course
i'm a chick

04-25-2007	#4
deutsch1979 TnTU Senior Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Gretna NE Age: 29 Posts: 291 Throcks: 334.51 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking How bad is it that everyone can agree that most of this is true? :)

04-25-2007	#5
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 13,909 Throcks: 19,237.41 Thanks: 14,262 Thanked 15,088 Times in 3,503 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking My 20's were fun but I don't think I'd want to do them again. I can relate to a lot of that. __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!!

04-25-2007	#6
ob1 Jedi SlaveBoy Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 7,191 Throcks: 2,705.02 Thanks: 1,356 Thanked 3,073 Times in 605 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking I'm a jedi...I have never even had so much as a drop of an alcoholic beverage in my life. __________________ Ban the lizards!

04-25-2007	#7
mike BOOOOOOOOOOOOBIES!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36 Posts: 15,222 Throcks: 6,970.30 Thanks: 16,062 Thanked 9,532 Times in 2,208 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking and jedi's are known as constant liars. __________________ If I like you, leave a message. If I don't , don't bother. If I don't know you, why the hell you calling me ??

04-25-2007	#9
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 13,909 Throcks: 19,237.41 Thanks: 14,262 Thanked 15,088 Times in 3,503 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking It's a secret ? __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!!

04-25-2007	#1
RyanB. even when you know you never know Listens: T95 - Wichita Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Kansas Age: 37 Posts: 1,172 Throcks: 477.38 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	5 Levels of Drinking LEVEL 1: It's 11pm on a weeknight, you've had a few beers. Just as you get up to leave because you have to work the next day, one of your friends buys another round -- one of your unemployed friends. Here, at level one, you think to yourself, "Oh come on, this is silly, as long as I get seven hours of sleep, I'll be fine." LEVEL 2: It's midnight. You've had a few more beers. You've just spent 20 minutes arguing against the use of artificial turf. You get up to leave again, but at level two, a little devil appears on your shoulder. And now you're thinking, "Hey! I'm out with my friends! What am I working for anyway? These are the good times! Besides, as long as I get five hours of sleep, I'm cool." LEVEL 3: 1am. You've abandoned beer for tequila. You've just spent 20 minutes arguing FOR the use of artificial turf. And now you're thinking, "Our waitress is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen!" At level three, you love the world. On the way to the bathroom, you buy a drink for the stranger at the end of the bar just because you like his face. You get drinking fantasies (like, "Hey fellas, if we bought our own bar, we could live together forever. We could do it. Tommy, you could cook."). But at level three, that devil is a little bit bigger... and he's buying. And you're thinking, "Oh, come on, come on now. As long as I get three hours of sleep... and a complete change of blood, I'm cool." LEVEL 4: 2am. And the devil is bartending. For last call, you ordered a bottle of rum and a Coke. You ARE artificial turf! This time, on your way to the bathroom, you punch the stranger at the end of the bar just because you don't like his face! And now you're thinking, "Our busboy is the best looking man I've ever seen." You and your friends decide to leave, right after you get thrown out, and one of you knows an afterhours bar. Here, at level four, you actually think to yourself, "Well... as long as I'm only going to get a few hours sleep anyway, I may as well stay up all night! Yeah! That'd be good for me. I don't mind going to that board meeting looking like Keith Richards. Yeah, I'll turn that around, make it work for me. And besides, as long as I get 31 hours sleep tomorrow, I'm cool." LEVEL 5: 5am. After unsuccessfully trying to get your money back at the tattoo parlor ("But I don't even know anybody named Simon!"), you and your friends wind up across the state line in a bar with guys who have been in prison as recently as... that morning. It's the kind of place where even the devil is saying, "Uh, I gotta turn in. I gotta be in Hell by nine." At this point, you're all drinking some kind of thick blue liquor, like something from a Klingon wedding. A waitress with fresh stitches comes over, and you think to yourself, "Someday I'm gonna marry that girl!" One of your friends stands up and screams, "WE'RE DRIVIN' TO VEGAS, BABY!!!!!" -- and passes out. You crawl outside for air, and then you hit the worst part of level 5 -- the sun. You weren't expecting that were you? You never do. You walk out of a bar in daylight, and you see people on their way to work or worse, jogging. And they look at you and they know. And they say, "Who's Simon?" Let's be honest, if you're 19 and you stay up all night, it's like a victory -- you've beat the night. But if you're over 30, then that sun is like God's flashlight. We all say the same prayer and then, "I swear, I will never do this again as long as I live!" And some of us have that little addition, "and this time, I mean it!"

04-25-2007	#2
mike BOOOOOOOOOOOOBIES!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36 Posts: 15,222 Throcks: 6,970.30 Thanks: 16,062 Thanked 9,532 Times in 2,208 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking I am not even going to say anything. __________________ If I like you, leave a message. If I don't , don't bother. If I don't know you, why the hell you calling me ??

04-25-2007	#3
Bud Wanna Bet??? Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Plattsmeth Age: 38 Posts: 13,909 Throcks: 19,237.41 Thanks: 14,262 Thanked 15,088 Times in 3,503 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking Level 6: "Hi, my name is Bob and I'm an alcholic." __________________ Time is Short Click Here, Free Naked Ladies 2007 TNTU.net Fantasy NASCAR Champion !!!

04-25-2007	#10
Thender Always riding the ragged edge of disaster. Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 38 Posts: 24,044 Throcks: 9,273.04 Thanks: 14,593 Thanked 16,861 Times in 4,166 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking Been there, done that... But with no tattoo... __________________ Shenandoah, American Legion Post #88 Color Guard, State Color Guard Champions for 2008 - 2009 Two in the mouth is worth one in the bush.

04-25-2007	#11
jpa Special Members Listens: Podcast Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Omaha Age: 28 Posts: 7,822 Throcks: 2,470.41 Thanks: 1,226 Thanked 5,485 Times in 1,129 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking no comment __________________ "Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance." --Sam Brown

04-25-2007	#12
RyanB. even when you know you never know Listens: T95 - Wichita Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Kansas Age: 37 Posts: 1,172 Throcks: 477.38 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking I have no tattoos either but I saw this and reminded me of alot of crazy stuff

04-25-2007	#14
deutsch1979 TnTU Senior Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Gretna NE Age: 29 Posts: 291 Throcks: 334.51 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking Anyone been to Sharks Club here? A friend suggested going out there and I haven't heard of it before. For my bday, we traveled to Lincoln (needed a sitter) and every bar we went to, sucked. I don't need a repeat of that night. I miss my hometown bars.

04-26-2007	#15
lilyvon schtupp i ride the short bus because i'm Listens: I don't listen Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: counciltucky Posts: 1,713 Throcks: 2,660.05 Thanks: 72 Thanked 1,903 Times in 360 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking #1 i've never had to argue about artificial turf, drunk or sober, EVER #2 what board meeting? i don't think i'll be missed at that sorry ass retail job #3 i know who "simon" is __________________ "We will NOT allow you to blaspheme The Monkees on this show!"- Todd

04-27-2007	#16
mike BOOOOOOOOOOOOBIES!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! Listens: Z92 - Mornings Join Date: May 2005 Age: 36 Posts: 15,222 Throcks: 6,970.30 Thanks: 16,062 Thanked 9,532 Times in 2,208 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking Lily, then your better than the rest of us!! __________________ If I like you, leave a message. If I don't , don't bother. If I don't know you, why the hell you calling me ??

04-27-2007	#17
lilyvon schtupp i ride the short bus because i'm Listens: I don't listen Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: counciltucky Posts: 1,713 Throcks: 2,660.05 Thanks: 72 Thanked 1,903 Times in 360 Posts	Re: 5 Levels of Drinking of course i'm a chick __________________ "We will NOT allow you to blaspheme The Monkees on this show!"- Todd

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