Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Thursday 1-3-02

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning by discussing more of the Husker coverage that has infiltrated the local TV news stations lately. From what Travis had told them yesterday, Channel 3 has about 9 people, including their two main news anchors in Pasadena to help cover tonight’s football game. One of the Channel 3 stories done last night by Deb Ward was about an L.A. sports writer’s article in which the ass size of Husker fans was made fun of. According to the writer, the average size of one seat at the Rose Bowl is about 17 inches and he believed that the average size of a Husker fan’s ass was about 25 inches. The writer expects total chaos to erupt when tens of thousands of chubby Husker fans attempt to squish themselves into the stadium tonight.

With the ass sizes of Husker fans representing Nebraska in the spotlight, Todd and Tyler took it upon themselves to check their own asses and compare them to the size of the Rose Bowl seats, as well as the average fat, Husker fan. Donnie’s butt measured 13 ¼ inches, Todd’s was 13 ¾ inches, Tyler’s was 13 ½ inches, Slave Boy Jeremy’s was a dainty12 ½ inches and with the largest ass of the morning, Brian came in at a hefty 14 5/8 inches. Brian attempted to dispute Donnie’s measuring technique throughout the morning but to no avail. He, with the exception of Travis who is out of town, definitely has the biggest booty on the show. As the program progressed, Donnie continued measuring the backsides of various office staff, giving detailed reports as the numbers came in. All in all, everyone measured this morning would be able to fit into a Rose Bowl seat, and everyone’s ass was significantly smaller than that of the average, fat, 25 inched ass of a Husker fan, as expressed by the L.A. sports writer.

Speaking of asses and Husker fans, TnT read a hate e-mail from someone who said that all of their Husker bashing was like beating a dead horse and told them to leave town if they don’t like Husker fans. They reread the letter later in the show as well, as the Husker discussion continued at various points. The guys also got a couple of calls from people who are in Pasadena for the game throughout today’s broadcast including a few from their friend Heavy C of the Nuclear Bees.

TnT received an inter-office e-mail from someone who wanted to encourage everyone at the station to wear their Husker gear to work today. They thought it might be fun to call various businesses located in Miami and see if the “wear your team’s gear on game day” phenomenon was prevalent there as well. In one of the better calls of the morning, TnT phoned a radio station that had attempted to hire them away from Z-92 in the past. They spoke to a receptionist, Margaret, for quite some time about a variety of things in the radio business as well as her history in radio, including their original purpose for the call. They joked around about the whole idea of the phone call, them calling on the air at their current station a station that had wanted to hire them in the past. It sounded a bit like the guys were trolling for a job, but it was still pretty funny stuff.

TnT continued phoning various Miami businesses throughout the show including a Starbucks, followed up by a call to a Win Dixie grocery store, a Marriott, and a Cracker Barrel. Nearly everyone they spoke to this morning was pleasant to them and each person informed TnT that no one working at their establishment was wearing Miami gear. At a few places, the people TnT talked to said that they had spotted a couple of customers wearing Miami t-shirts, though. TnT seemed to prove their point this morning while making their phone calls, that point being that the people of Nebraska have so little going on with their lives that the only thing that really matters to them is the college football team. People in a city such as Miami have lots of things going on and much more important things to care about besides how a bunch of 18 to 22-year-old men perform on a football field.

The guys spent some time this morning discussing a quiz from Maxim Magazine. The quiz asked a variety of questions relating to relationships and, based on the answers provided, a scoring system determined how long you could expect to be married to your current spouse. The guys each took the quiz with their prospective lady in mind and the results were surprising. According to the results of the quiz, Donnie, who has already been married to Caller 9 for a year, should only expect to be with her for about 1 year. Tyler also scored in the 1-year area of the field after answering the questions about he and Becky’s relationship. Todd, on the other hand, blasted the other two out of the water by scoring a 30-year total from the quiz. As the guys discussed the outcomes, they decided to add their own questions to the list, including alternative scorings. They then used their new scoring system and additional questions to re-rank their love lives and surprise, with their own scoring system, everyone seemed to do much better on the quiz. In an odd twist, Tyler quizzed Donnie and Todd as though they were married. The pair ended up being 14 years in the hole as a couple, which everyone seemed to get a kick out of.

Travis checked in from Pasadena again this morning and filled TnT on what he had planned for today, as well as tonight’s post-game coverage of the Rose Bowl. Trav also told TnT that he finally went out and had some fun last night, attending the House of Blues and the legendary comedy club, The Comedy Store. TnT seemed proud of Travis for choosing to visit the two very cool L.A. nightclubs. Before Trav left the guys, he asked all of the TnT show listeners to give his post-game coverage on Channel 3 a try even though the game is actually airing on Channel 7.

Well, that’s the update for today. Tune in tonight at 10pm for the 3rd Shift Replay and then rejoin TnT tomorrow morning at 5:30am for another show. If the Huskers loose tonight, you can bet the guys will be talking about it tomorrow. However, if they win, the chances are pretty high that TnT will finally put and end to this year’s Husker season for good and not bring up the game at all. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-