Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Friday 9-29-00

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning having a little fun with some things in the news and some newscasters themselves. They also set the stage for the Talladega trip giveaway and all the contestants who would participate in the event later in the show. The callers in the early portion of the show were typical for a Friday: very, very bad. Thankfully, the guys didn’t have to put up with too many of them because they had an interview call them.

TnT had a conversation with Mark Summers this morning. He’s hosted all sorts of game shows including Nickelodeon’s “Double Dare”. Mark checked in with TnT today to promote his new game show called “History IQ”. It is going to be debuting on the History Channel at 6:30pm on October 2nd. Mark talked with TnT about his past game show experiences and then described “History IQ”. He also read TnT a few questions from the show so they could get a feel for what it would be like. Later in the interview, TnT brought up the Dateline report done on Mark about a year ago where he detailed his troubles with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. They talked for a while about OCDs and how Mark has come to deal with it. This is TnT’s second interview with Mark (that I can remember) and it was quite entertaining. He seems like a very cool guy. Remember to check out his show on the History Channel next week.

Todd and Tyler left the studio for the parking lot this morning right around 7:30 to begin their big Talladega trip giveaway contest. The first contestant was a guy named Todd who snorted an oyster through his nose and into his mouth. He also ate the oyster. The audio was disturbing enough but the visual must have been pretty bad too as the crowd who had gathered and Todd and Tyler gagged. The second contestant was a guy named Heath. He was going to try to break a schnapps bottle over his head. The first time he tried, the bottle “ping”ed like an aluminum baseball bat knocking one out of the park. He tried again and, this time with the microphone closer, provided TnT with yet another “ping”. Heath tried a third time and was still unable to break the bottle. Seeing the damage he’d done to his head, a quickly growing lump, TnT set Heath aside and brought up Carla. Carla had volunteered to be covered in honey and feathers, which TnT and some of the crowd were more than happy to do to her. She then walked around for a while and, as far as the show was concerned, was never heard from again. Afterwards, Tyler coaxed Heath to come back up for a 4th attempt at breaking the bottle over his head. On the fourth try, his head “pinged” yet again and Heath was brought to his knees. At that point, Barb took Heath into the station to get him some ice for his swelling lump.

In one of the most horrible audio events I’ve ever experienced on the Todd and Tyler show, another Talladega contestant named Travis brought out a baby pig from a cooler. The noise emanating from the poor, scared animal was excruciating. To begin his task for the Talladega trip, Travis slit open the scrotum of the pig with an Exact-O knife and pulled his tiny testicles out. Travis then proceeded to bite off, one at a time, the terrified, squealing pig’s little nuts and spit them to the ground near the gathered crowd. It was funny, the crowd enjoyed it, the listeners enjoyed it and TnT seemed to enjoy seeing it but I will never forget the terrible noises that pig made. It was, in a word, horrible.

Another Talladega contestant named Jake was originally going to eat some stink bait. After careful thought, Todd and Tyler decided they’d cover the guy in the raunchy smelling substance and send him to an FDR building and ask him to try to apply for a job. Once Jake was covered, Big Pussy drove him to an undisclosed FDR location and sent him in. Jake, with cell phone in hand and vile stink bait all over his body, approached the receptionist and asked for an application. Shortly thereafter, Jake walked around the FDR lobby asking people if he could help them with their bags and begged for people to hug him. It was hilarious. Later, TnT found out that Jake was quite drunk and that was the reason he seemed so uninhibited during his portion of the show.

The last contestant for the Talladega trip was a woman named Alice. She had her nipple pierced on the air by a guy named Lee from Villains. Lee did a play-by-play while Todd, Tyler, Basile the comedian and any other guy who was around stared at the 40 Ds Alice had laid out on the proverbial table. When the piercing took place, Alice dropped the S-bomb.

After all of the contestants had done their parts, the guys took phone calls from listeners who wanted to vote for the winner. An overwhelming majority of the callers who checked in sympathized with Heath, the pinging head. Donnie, at one point, isolated the “ping” sound effect and it was quickly hot buttoned into Tyler’s computer. That sound effect was prominently featured throughout the remainder of the show. There were votes for other contestants as well but without a doubt, Heath received the most votes and won the trip for 2 to Talladega. Congratulations Heath.

Larry the Cable Guy checked in this morning and delivered a commentary on UFOs. He seemed amused by the fact that it’s always an ugly redneck from the hills who’s abducted and never a hot cheerleader from a city. I believe this commentary was a repeat performance but it was still funny.

Travis’s Lock of the week is Illinois getting a point on the road in Minnesota. I’m not a better so I have no idea what that means but I’m sure all of you who weekly put down your paychecks on Travis’s Lock know exactly what he’s trying to say. Travis’s Box of the Week is the horribly disturbing Camryn Manheim of “The Practice”. You can check her out by http://abc.go.com/primetime/the_prac...manheim.html” target=blank>clicking here.

Basile from the Funny Bone came in and hung out with TnT for their show. He joined in on the topics of the day and seemed to get a kick out of all of the Talladega contestants. Basile also spent some time talking with TnT about his act and being Greek. Call the Bone Phone at 493-8036 for reservations. He’s got a great act and has one of the funniest opening lines on the comedy circuit.

That’s all I’ve got for today’s update. It was a great show even if the noises from that baby pig will haunt me for the rest of my life. Check back on Monday for another update. Thanks for watching. Good night. –Corby Bender-