Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Tuesday 1-16-01

Todd and Tyler started off this morning’s show by reading a stack of e-mails from yesterday. The subjects of the e-mails all had something to do that took part during yesterday’s show. After recapping them, Todd discussed an e-mail he got through his home Internet service provider. The e-mail was titled something along the lines of, “How to enlarge your penis!” Well, Todd checked out the e-mail and found out it was trying to sell him a $20 penis pump. After reading through it, he noticed a statistic that just didn’t seem correct. According to the message, 83% of women are unsatisfied with the size of their man’s penis. Hearing that stat, TnT thought they’d poll their female listeners to see if the stat was true. Callers checked in for a while as TnT continued discussing penis sizes. One of the funnier calls came from TnT’s blind, African American, squeaky-airy-freaky voiced caller, Nephritides. She claimed to have only slept with white men and everyone she’s been with has been huge. In fact, she said she measured one of her boyfriend’s throcks and it was 14 inches. Of course, TnT didn’t quite believe her accuracy because, well, she’s BLIND, but let her continue rambling about penis sizes anyway. Then, in a startling revelation, Nephritides told TnT that even though she’s been with men with huge penises, “I’m tight!” It was humorous, albeit disturbing, but humorous nonetheless. Later, she phoned again and sucked the life out of the show by telling TnT that her daddy used to tell her about his sexual escapades with various sluts.

Donnie came in this morning and shared a convoluted tale about a love affair that happened on New Years Eve. Without naming names specifically, the guys set up the scenario for the love affair. Basically, a bunch of couples from a small town went to a hotel for one of the $200 New Years Eve party things where drinks, a room and a party are included in the package. There are two couples involved in the tale, one of which was married for 3 years, the other for just 2 weeks. The man from the 3-year marriage evidently knocked it out in his car with the woman from the 2-week marriage. Somehow her bra ended up in Donnie’s buddy’s truck (hence how Donnie found out about the story). These are all people Donnie knew so he didn’t give out anyone’s real name. He figured by now, two weeks after the fact, everyone in the small town already knows about the situation so by him telling it on the air, it wouldn’t really be stirring up any trouble. As the show progressed, Donnie checked in with his buddy who originally filled him in on the story to see if anyone had contacted him about spilling the beans. His buddy, named “Z” (?), said he hadn’t heard anything.

After telling the story, the guys opened up the phone lines and asked listeners to share similar seedy tales of drunken stupidity and relationship screw-ups. After a while, they really weren’t getting any calls on the subject so they moved on to something slightly different yet still in the same vein. They spent some time reading from ivillage.com regarding men’s excuses for cheating. The discussion then lead into a huge argument between Donnie, Todd and Tyler over Tyler’s “caveman theory”. For years, Tyler has been saying that men are genetically programmed to spread their seed, hence cheat, but as man evolved, they were able to overcome it (some, for the most part, kind-of, except the college years, sort of). Todd, having heard Tyler’s theory for years, has started to agree with him and in reality, his argument is logical and has been proven as far as you know. Donnie, on the other hand, wasn’t buying into the caveman theory at all. The gang bickered back and forth on the subject throughout the remainder of the show.

TnT spoke with Ted Nugent this morning. He spent some time talking with TnT about hunting with Todd and Tyler. Ted went into a detailed story about how he killed a bear back in the 70’s. He rambled on about various other hunting-related things for a while as well. Finally, Ted got around to talking to TnT about music. He mentioned that the Damned Yankees had recorded a bunch of stuff recently but when it was engineered for them and they listened to it, they felt it sounded like crap. So, the fellas are going to try it again. Ted also mentioned he redid “Strangle Hold” and “Cat Scratch Fever” and said he’d be doing a new album sometime in March. Ted is going to be in town on February 2-4th at the 21st Annual Sports Show taking place at the Civic. He’s going to be singing stuff and giving away free crap as well. Stop on out and see him.

Tomorrow, Dr. Ed will not be joining TnT but they will still be doing the milk-drinking contest. Hopefully Dr. Ed will be in again soon. As for tomorrow’s little contest, if you’ve ever wanted to hear grown men puke on the radio, make sure to tune in! That’s all for today’s update. Check back here tomorrow for the Wednesday version. Thanks for watching. Good night. –Corby-