Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Monday 1-21-02

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning by discussing a variety of things. Over the weekend, the guys watched the NFL playoffs so they spent a bit of time commenting on the games. Tyler was pleased that his Steelers won and everyone seemed happy that Green Bay got their asses handed to them due to Favre’s 84 interceptions. Tyler talked about the Wells Fargo party he went to where they introduced, “the newest member to the team: Long Wong”. He also tantalized Todd by informing him of the fishing video slot machine he encountered over at the boats this weekend. Todd took his 11-year-old son to see “Black Hawk Down” over the weekend. While in the movie, his son accidentally spilled a gallon of Sprite on Todd’s crotch so he had to endure the movie with sticky pants. Everyone piled on Todd for taking his young son to see such an adult movie, but Todd defended himself, saying his son enjoys such movies and has grown out of the kiddie flick stage.

Also early in the show, TnT read over a couple of e-mails from their listeners. One was from an African American listener who was upset with TnT for their comments about the dead pop hottie Aaliyah. The e-mailer wondered why TnT seemed to spout out some form of hate whenever they discussed black artists. The guys clarified by saying that they don’t hate Aaliyah or any other black artist because of the color of their skin, they just don’t dig dance music. The e-mailer called in shortly after they read her message and said that she didn’t mean to come across as if she were calling TnT racists in the e-mail. Another listener named Lynn from St. Joseph, MO wrote TnT a very nice e-mail saying that she found their show and likes it very much. After the guys read the e-mail, she called them from her home and said that she had just downloaded the listening software so she could hear their show over the web. Welcome Lynn to the Todd and Tyler family!

On an unrelated note, at one point in this morning’s show TnT busted out into spontaneous chorus by singing the “Clay Henry, Clay Henry” tune from the new Subway commercial. Brian mentioned he was getting sick of seeing it and at that point, Tyler bellowed the tune out. It was hilarious! He knew all the words! Somehow during their talk of the song, it was morphed into “Big Pussy, Big Pussy”, using most of the same words to the actual tune such as, “He got real fat on burgers and fries, now he’s down to a smaller size. Big Pussy, Big Pussy”. I laughed so hard my glass eye popped out.

The main discussion of the morning centered around one very disturbing tale from the newspaper. The story was about a 50ish floral shop owner in Wayne, NE who was busted for holding a 36-year-old Texas man hostage as his gimp for 9 days. The two had hooked up on the web for some funky torture sex and after two days of it, the Texas man wanted to call it off. The flower shop owner wouldn’t let him go and continued to use him as his bondage torture gimp for 9 more days. The Texas man was finally able to escape with the help of the handy-man, who also may have been involved in the gimp sex because he is charged along with the shop owner, and returned to Texas where he phoned the police on the guy from Wayne.

Todd and Tyler discussed the details of the Wayne Gimp story and, as I’m sure you can imagine, had a great time with it. They read over some quotes from the paper as well and were pretty pissed at the coffee shop owner across from the floral shop who basically said that the Texas man got what he deserved. TnT disagreed, stating that even though torturing your gay gimp love slave like in “Pulp Fiction” may not be their cup of tea, no one deserves to be tied up and held hostage for 9 days against their will. Throughout the entire show, TnT received many calls from listeners who had encountered the floral shop owner in one way or another, many of which were college students who had either worked for him or rented an apartment from him while attending school. I’m sure today isn’t going to be the last we hear of the Wayne Gimp tale. Tune in tomorrow to see what else TnT will have to say about it.

The guys had a lengthy discussion about movies this morning, as the Golden Globes aired on TV last night. They discussed many movies they wanted to see as well as talking about what they’ve heard of the movies. Brian and Travis disagreed on “The Lord Of The Rings”; Brian stating it sucked. Todd talked more about “Black Hawk Down” and that lead the guys into discussion about the actual real-life incident the film was based on. Before wrapping up the discussion, the guys also talked a bit about some of the TV shows and actors/actresses that were nominated and won last night.

Brian read another wedding announcement this morning. Actually, he didn’t have the announcement in front of him, instead going off what was sent to him via e-mail by a listener. The content of the announcement were not presented to us but the content wasn’t really necessary. The first name of the woman in the engagement announcement was Candy. Her soon-to-be husband’s last name was Assmann. Yes, ladies and gentleman, the woman’s name will soon be Candy Assmann. At first, no one believed the announcement because A) it came in over the e-mail and B) they hadn’t seen it in the paper. All of the guy’s speculations were put aside, though, when Mr. Assmann himself phoned the show and talked to TnT. Surprisingly, he wasn’t pissed at them for making fun of his name. Instead, he seemed to find it rather humorous as well. He said his name was actually pronounced “Os-man”, yet admitted to being made fun of for his name for as long as he could remember.

After the Wahoo newspaper pulled their crime report due to the exposure it was getting on the Todd and Tyler show, the guys haven’t been reading much about small town crimes lately. Well, they brought it back this morning with a very funny North Platte Crime Report. The crimes were miniscule, much like those that used to be in the Wahoo report. Specifically, I can recall one incident in which a lady called the police because she was getting unwanted phone calls from her own mother. Donnie created an excellent reenactment of another incident involving two young women fighting in public. There is just no way to describe the awesome production done by Donnie on the reenactment. You’ll just have to hope that TnT replay Donnie’s masterpiece again tomorrow.

A drunken Larry the Cable Guy checked in this morning and delivered a commentary for TnT. This morning, Larry wondered why there isn’t a national signing day for high school activities other than sports, such as band. It was pretty funny even though I seem to recall Larry doing this commentary previously. Larry will be in town at the Funny Bone again soon but was too drunk to mention when this morning. Stay tuned as the week progresses and Larry sobers up for more.

As the show continued, Travis came in and did the sports and talked about the weekend football games with TnT for a while. The guys continued discussing the Gimp of Wayne and they concluded this morning’s program by replaying the North Platte Crime Report reenactment.

It was a great show this morning and now that you’ve read this, you should be all up-to-date. Tune in tonight at 10pm for the 3^rd Shift Replay and join TnT tomorrow at 5:30am for another show. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-

Big Pussy, Big Pussy… The song’s been stuck in my head all day…