Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Tuesday 1-29-02

Todd and Tyler started off their show today by discussing the idiot who interrupted the Unicameral yesterday by shouting racial slurs at Ernie Chambers, who wasn’t even in the room at the time. TnT wondered how it was possible for racist idiots like that guy to still be living in the mindset of the 1800’s. The guys speculated that the incident might lead to another artistic T-shirt creation on the part of Mr. Chambers. I guess we’ll have to tune in to, “The Man Is Keeping Me Down” show on public access to see.

Also early in the program, TnT read over some bad e-mails from a few of their listeners. One was from the Ralston drama club, an upcoming dodge ball opponent, in the form of a very pitiful poem filled with lame attempts at smack. If the drama club can’t even rhyme, how are they going to be able to defeat the dodge ball Jedi of the Todd and Tyler Traveling Dodge Ball All Star team? Another e-mailer tried to draw a connection to the way TnT felt when they lost their friend Dodge County Duke to the way the e-mailer felt when Dale Earnhardt died. That e-mail, too, was very pitiful. The final bad e-mail this morning came from a member of the Omaha Wrestling Association who’s terribly written message tried to bash on TnT and Donnie and claimed that members of the OWA may be attending an upcoming dodge ball game in an attempt to disrupt the match and draw attention to their organization. As you can imagine, those three e-mails left TnT with plenty to talk about throughout the show.

During Brian’s newscast and a story on Enron, Donnie approached the microphone and attempted to distribute financial advice to anyone willing to listen. He didn’t understand why all of the fired and retired Enron employees didn’t sell their stocks before the company collapsed. TnT, Brian, and even some of the listeners tried to explain the situation to Donnie but it didn’t seem to be sinking in. The argument continued for a while, resurfacing later in the show, and the conclusion was drawn that one probably shouldn’t take financial advice from a bankrupt redneck.

Brian read another news story today about a couple of truck drivers who got into a fight over their CB radios and ended up meeting in a York rest area to battle it out fist to fist, or knife to knife, as the case may be. Eventually, one of the truck drivers squished the other guy between their rigs and killed him. It was a horrible story but it lead TnT into a discussion about road rage, driving etiquette, CB radios, and angst ridden, tired, sleepy, tense truckers who are looking for ways to release their angers and frustrations. They took some calls from truck drivers throughout the show, most of which sharing stories about hearing truckers arguing over their CBs.

Alex, the homeless man TnT adopted last year, called the guys this morning from the 4^th floor of St. Joseph hospital. He’s got pneumonia and was admitted yesterday. Alex blamed the pneumonia on the weather change and, once again, as he’s done in every call to TnT since they built him his shed, complained about not having a heater in his home. The guys stressed, once again, that putting a kerosene heater in an enclosed shed like Alex’s could cause a dangerous health hazard to him (it’d blow his ass up) but that point seemed to drift through one ear and out the other. Before they let him go, TnT tried to get the phone number to Alex’s room so they could check up on him and his pneumonia. The poor guy was obviously a bit confused, though, as he gave TnT a 12-digit phone that began with the country code for Zimbabwe. I’m sure we’ll be hearing from Alex again in the future so stay tuned.

TnT spent some time this morning discussing a Cosmo article that detailed 10 things women should never do for their men. Most of them were no brainers and after a short time, TnT concluded that the list was stupid and didn’t want to carry on with it any further. “Cosmo just sucks,” said Tyler.

After going over the bad Cosmo list, the guys moved on to discussing a better one from E! Entertainment. The list detailed the 25 hottest women in entertainment. Originally, TnT had planned to go over the list with James the Giant Peach because he has strange taste in hot women, much like Travis. Because James was in a meeting when they got around to the list, TnT substituted Travis for the Peach, who played the roll exactly as you would expect. He found things wrong with quite a few of the bombshells on the list. As they went through each name, the gang spent some time discussing the women. In order to avoid 30 minutes of crotch seepage and “aaawwwhhahawhahahhawh” radio (yes, that’s the Homer Simpson drool sound effect), they decided to be a bit pickier than what you might expect. All in all, though, everyone seemed to agree with the varying degrees of hotness demonstrated by the women on the list. I was surprised that Jennifer Garner, the hottie from “Alias” and Jessica Alba, the hottie from “Dark Angel” didn’t appear at all! What a shame.

As the show progressed, the guys continued discussing the early morning topics of the day. They took quite a few phone calls from truck drivers who had stories to share about truckers fighting via the CB radio. They also took some doge ball calls from Villisca; several of them included some very good smack from the axe-wielders. They continued making fun of Travis for inviting the Mormons into his house for water and cookies and the guys also piled a bit more on Donnie’s redneck financial advice.

Keep in mind that tomorrow is the Violation of Villisca! The Todd and Tyler Traveling Dodge Ball All Star team will be headed to rural Iowa to pound their axe-wielding opponents with cushy, red rubber spheres. Everyone is invited to come, except news chick Brian’s mother who, as we found out this morning, is embarrassed to be associated with the fine, upstanding Todd and Tyler radio show because she considers them a form of the Anti-Christ on Earth. The few good phone calls from Villisca this morning will hopefully carry over to tomorrow’s program as we all prepare for the battle.

Well, that’s the update for today. Tune in tonight for the 3^rd Shift Replay at 10pm and rejoin TnT tomorrow from 5:30am to 10am for another show. You also might want to make note that the guys will be re-airing the 1-hour tribute to Dodge County Duke that took place at the end of yesterday’s show on the Saturday Best Of between 9 and 10am. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-