Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Monday 5-20-02

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning with a little reaction to their golf tournament that took place on Friday. They told a story about how ‘’Pos’’ of Channel 3 locked in his keys and had to bust out a small window of his vehicle in order to make it to the station in time for the 5pm newscast on Friday. Then the gang spent some time talking about how Donnie discovered the ‘’wha-wha’’ effects of Whip-Its. Yes, one of the Fish Heads was finally able to get Donnie high with a little Nitrous Oxide while on the golf course.

Also early in the show, Todd mentioned that he wasn’t feeling very well because of a bad burrito he had eaten last night. He said that anyone else would have stayed home from work today but because of the type of job he has, he came in anyway and pushed through the show. To everyone’s delight, poor Todd ended up pooping himself during the first segment of the show during an attempt to squeeze out a test fart. ‘’It was productive,’’ he said. Todd informed everyone of his little incident only after Tyler broke for a commercial. He did this because he feared that if he would have admitted it prior to the first commercial break, Donnie and Tyler would have talked about it, extending the time Todd had to sit with burrito ass foam in his britches.

Not only was Todd sick from the ass, but several times later in the show he made trips to the bathroom to puke. As he examined his expulsion, he realized that the culprit in his sickness was most likely bad meat that he had eaten with some nachos last night. Throughout the remainder of the show, Tyler, Donnie and Brian made references to food, attempting to worsen Todd’s condition and make the poor guy puke again. It was quite humorous. By the end of the show, Todd had puked up what looked to be a sperm-like cherry stem. Oddly, he saved the stem and awarded it to Donnie before they said goodbye.

The big story of this morning came about when Brian arrived to do the news. According to reports, a 28-year-old gym teacher at Northwest High School was arrested for having child porn. The story goes, though, that he actually filmed himself having sex with a 17-year-old student. His female roommate, perhaps a jaded lover TnT allegedly speculated, found the tape and turned him in. Even though it is legal for an adult to have sex with someone 16-years-old or older as long as they consent, the law says that no person under the age of 18-years-old can appear on film or video because that’s child porn. To begin with, TnT disagreed with the whole concept of the guy being busted for child porn. To them, child porn is the sick stuff with little kids and in their mind, a 17-year-old senior isn’t a little kid. It is, after all, legal to have consensual sex with her.

The guys spoke to a few lawyers about the various legal issues related to the story and they even got a call from a student named Josh who is also a senior at Northwest. His hilarious phone call to Todd and Tyler was great. It was obvious the kid has been listening to TnT for quite a while because when he described the girl in the story, he referred to her as a ‘’box’’ and he made a reference or two to how every guy at Northwest High ‘’twists off’’ to the girl from the story. Later in the show, TnT broke out the recorded call of Josh and played it.

As the guys continued discussing the Northwest gym teacher who video taped himself having sex with a 17-year-old student, TnT thought they would open up the phone lines and see if they could get some calls from people who have had sex with teachers. They got a few here and there but the most spectacular call came from a 19-year-old Iowa State college student named Kitty. She said she’s a cheerleader for the university and then went on to tell TnT about how she was banging one of her teachers in an Omaha school back when she was a Freshman and Sophomore in high school. Kitty and her story were both quite sexy. So sexy, in fact, that I neglected to write down any further details of her tale in my update notes. Sorry, check out the 3^rd Shift Replay.

Larry the Cable Guy checked in this morning with a commentary on how Rosie is finally about to leave television. There’s not much more to say about the commentary so I’ll move on.

Travis came in to do the sports report today. He talked a little bit about Todd and Tyler’s golf tournament, the tournament he didn’t attend because he had to cover the all important high school state track meet. Before wrapping up his broadcast, TnT talked with Trav about some possible ‘’For What It’s Worth’’ topics for tonight’s 10pm Channel 3 newscast. The guys wanted Travis to take their angle on the Northwest teacher, saying that it was legal, consensual sex and just because it was video taped, it shouldn’t be considered child porn. It didn’t seem like Travis was incredibly excited about taking such an angle, though. Check out Attaboy on Channel 3 tonight and see what he chose as his ‘’For What It’s Worth’’ topics.

The guys spoke to J Medicine Hat for a bit this morning. He’s having his X-rated show at the Funny Bone tonight beginning at 7:30pm and after that, he won’t be returning to Omaha until some time in mid July. Hat wanted to invite everyone out to see his show and then enticed us all by saying that he has some new blow up dolls that he will be introducing tonight. He also said he will be debuting 3 new dirty bits that he hasn’t done here in Omaha before so it should be an interesting show. Call the Bone Phone at 493-8036 for your Indian reservations.

Todd and Tyler announced this morning that they are going to be doing a new ‘’What Would You Do’’ contest one week from this Friday. The winner of this year’s contest will be awarded tickets to see the Tyson Vs. Lewis fight in Memphis in June. This year, the guys are looking for contestants with ideas that would involve some sort of audio. It is, after all, a radio show they do each morning. They pointed out that some of the ideas for the last contest didn’t come across that well on radio (Stink Bait, the tar-n-feather lady) so this year, they’re asking you all to step it up with your suggestions. Feel free to phone Todd and Tyler or e-mail them your idea. Based on the ideas and suggestions they receive, the gang will choose this year’s contestants and you could be going to see the Tyson Vs. Lewis fight in Memphis. Stay tuned for further details.

To wrap up today’s show, Brian came in with an entertainment report. During that report, he read a new wedding announcement for this week. What made this one so strange was not a fraternity/sorority overkill like most announcements, it was more that the groom is a current Husker and more so that the picture of the couple in the paper shows them both all necked out in cowboy gear. The guys spent some time discussing the cowboy hat phenomenon, stating that they just don’t get it. Paraphrasing, ‘’Why would someone want to dress up like a mythical person? You don’t see people walking around in Viking outfits.’’ They continued discussing that and a few other items from Brian’s e-news before wrapping up their show.

Tomorrow TnT will be speaking with Brett Michaels of Poison. Z-92 has a part in bringing the band to the Nebraska State Fair this year so Brett will chat with the guys about the upcoming concert. I’m sure there will be plenty of talk about Tyler’s sister during that conversation too, as his sister used to date Brett Michaels when they were in high school. Even though no one will admit that Michaels of Poison probably smooched up the sexy with Tyler’s sister, there’s always the possibility that it allegedly occurred and either Todd or Donnie will bring it up. It should be another great show so tune in early and stick around all day.

That’s it for today’s update. Tune in tonight at 10pm for the 3^rd Shift Replay of this morning’s show and make sure to join TnT tomorrow at 5:30am for the Tuesday program. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-