Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Thursday 5-23-02

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning by discussing last night’s ‘’Celebrity Boxing 2’’ that aired on Fox. Both of the guys saw a good portion of the fights but each seemed to have a different view on the quality of the show. Tyler mentioned that he felt the show was just bad TV while Todd said he enjoyed the program. TnT then discussed the various bouts and celebrities that participated. Following that, they phoned Slave Boy Jeremy at home to see if he had heard that Buttafuoco won. Jeremy said that he had and because of the bet he had with Todd on the match, Slave Boy Jeremy will now have to go to Lake Cunningham with a ‘’Fondle Me’’ sign some time next week. The guys spent some time brainstorming alternate words for Jeremy’s sign, as to avoid getting him arrested, and later in the show it seemed like they were set on ‘’Free Shaft and Balls’’. They figured they could just give Jeremy a couple of copies of the movie ‘’Shaft’’ and some Todd and Tyler golf tournament balls so if he does get approached by police for soliciting lewd behavior, he’s have some form of protection. The guys then replayed their hilarious ‘’bald cock’’ chicken discussion that occurred late in yesterday’s show before Brian came in and did the news. By the way, wind sucks.

Also early in the show, TnT discussed Channel 7’s story last night about ‘’Slanguage’’ as reported by Julie Cornell. According to what they saw, Julie sat around with a bunch of teenagers to discuss slang currently being used by today’s youth. Todd and Tyler were utterly blown away at how difficult it was for them to understand the slang terms Julie found out about from the kids she talked with. Wait a minute, no they weren’t. As it turns out, a majority of the slang terms kids were using were either identical to or slight variations of slang terms that have been around forever. Calling a beautiful woman ‘’hot’’ or ‘’a 10’’, referring to a vehicle as ‘’a ride’’, and calling diamonds ‘’ice’’ were among a few of the slang terms TnT thought were no brainers, as they’ve all been around for a long time. Scattered throughout the remainder of today’s show, TnT discussed the ‘’Slanguage’’ report and made tongue-in-cheek statements about how out of control youth slang has gotten.

Related to the other topics of the morning, things they saw on TV last night, the guys had a discussion about the ‘’Greatest Game Show Moments’’ program that aired at the same time as the boxing matches. A few of the more memorable moments were discussed including the famous ‘’Up the butt, Bob’’ answer from the ‘’Newlywed Game’’. Everyone has heard that the phrase was never uttered and it was actually an urban legend. Well on the show last night, they aired the actual clip from 1977. To TnT’s surprise, the lady didn’t actually say what everyone has always claimed, ‘’Up the butt, Bob’’. In reality, when asked where the strangest place she’s ever had the urge to have sex, her reply was ‘’In the ass.’’ Of course, the word ‘’ass’’ was bleeped out, which disappointed the guys. TnT spent a little time discussing how something that actually happened could have turned into an urban legend and then wondered what other urban legends might have come from truths.

Somehow the guys got onto the topic of names this morning. I don’t remember exactly how the topic came up but it turned out to be pretty interesting. TnT mentioned that they don’t get why parents would name all of their kids with the same first letter. Furthermore, they don’t understand why parents would name their child the same first name as the father. In their opinions, doing so could hold the child back from evolving their own identity. On top of that, they discussed names that you wouldn’t associate with little kids. ‘’You never see a 2-year-old ‘Fred’ do you?’’ Later Brian said he knew a family where every kid had the same middle name. Calls and e-mails poured in on the subject; each caller telling about how they know someone who used the same first letter naming system for their kids.

During their name conversation, Todd remembered that his sister had named her kids all with the same first letter. He attempted to rattle off the kid’s names to demonstrate but then realized he couldn’t remember one of them. Yes, Todd had forgotten the name of his sister’s oldest son, Todd’s very own first nephew. It was a pretty funny moment. Todd kind of bummed out that his brain froze up so he phoned his mom to find out what the kid’s name was. She didn’t seem all that surprised that Todd would forget his own nephew’s name and eventually told him what it was. She then told him that his father had originally planned to name Todd ‘’Lat’’ but she squashed that idea quickly. Everyone got a kick out of that because ‘’Lat’’ is a very strange name. Todd’s mom said that his dad got the idea for that name from an old western movie. Later the guys called Todd’s dad at work to figure out which film the name came from. In yet another hilarious moment of peaking into the mind of Todd, he asked his father if he was named after a character from a movie made in the 1970’s. Keep in mind that Todd was born in the late 50’s… Laughs ensued.

Donnie makes his daughter wear her underwear on her head. Now I pondered just typing that one line and leaving it to bounce around in your brain until your head exploded but then I realized it would be even more fun to actually explain the details behind that sentence. So here we go…

Donnie mentioned, sort of out of the blue, that he made his 6-year-old daughter wear her underwear on her head yesterday because she had peed her pants. His thought was that this would embrace his daughter and she would stop peeing her pants. Todd and Tyler seemed to find Donnie’s method of parenting in this situation a bit disturbing, as did Travis and Colleen from the Funny Bone. Travis tried to tell Donnie that what his daughter had done showed some emotional problems and said, ‘’she’s screaming for help!’’ He referenced Donnie’s divorce to Caller 8 as being the possible culprit for the emotional problems and said that Donnie should probably try to take his daughter in for some counseling before he totally screws up his kid. Colleen was a bit more harsh and said, ‘’You are absolutely horrible.’’ The whole group discussed Donnie’s parenting warped methods for a bit and eventually gave up trying to fix him.

Chris Porter from the Funny Bone came in and hung out with the guys for a while today. He joined in on the topics of this morning’s show and seemed to fit in nicely with the guys. Several times during his visit, you could tell that he was a bit stunned at not only what Todd and Tyler could say on the air, but also at some of the stupid things Donnie said, including the thing about the pee filled underwear on his daughter’s head. By the way, if you happen to get a good look at Chris’s penis this weekend, don’t be entirely surprised if you happen to see it covered in sparkling glitter. Make your reservations for the Funny Bone by phoning 493-8036.

Cheshire Grin came in studio towards the end of the show and did a couple of tunes for TnT. Before beginning, the gang talked about some of the changes within the band. One of which was the addition of former Ivory Star bass player, Troy. The group discussed their last CD and current CD/DVD project and then got into playing their two tunes. By the way, you can catch Cheshire Grin at the Anchor Inn on Friday and Saturday night. They will also be playing along with a bunch of other bands at the Anchor Inn on Sunday for the big Rockin’ on the River summer kickoff bash. The gates open at noon and it’ll be backed so make sure to get there quite early.

To close the show, comedian Chris Porter jumped on Cheshire Grin’s drum kit and Donnie grabbed Todd’s saxophone and the two performed a ‘’little to no talent’’ jam. I don’t think that minute or two of show will end up on a CD any time soon but it was still rather funny to mentally picture Donnie tearing it up on sax.

Tomorrow the guys will be joined by John Morgan from the Funny Bone and the Fish Heads are scheduled to come in and play. It should be a great show so tune in at 5:30am for the program. Keep in mind that if you missed today’s show and don’t feel updated enough by reading this page, you can still catch this morning’s show tonight at 10pm as it airs during the 3^rd Shift Replay. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-