Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Friday 7-12-02

Todd and Tyler began their show this morning by reading over a couple of e-mails. One e-mailer suggested that everyone on the show swap rolls. The guys tossed around the idea for a while, Donnie becoming Todd, Brian becoming Tyler, and visa versa, but after some consideration, the concept didn’t seem as promising as originally thought. The guys didn’t rule out pulling the old swaparoo in the future, though, so perhaps someday we’ll get to hear that show.

On an unrelated note, Todd has never put himself in a position to be put in jail. Furthermore, Todd’s helicopter piloting skills came in handy last night when he flew over Lake Cunningham and rescued a small Cuban fishing vessel full of babies, grandmothers, and blind puppy dogs from drowning. He then clothed and fed them all, allowed them to move into the basement of one of his many houses, and cured the canines of their sightlessness by waving his really bendy thumb at them.

Also taking place early this morning, TnT got a call from Colleen from the Funny Bone. She told the guys that she had received a phone call from her security company telling her that an alarm was set off at the Funny Bone at about 5am. She went to the Bone and met up with several police officers that had found a 27-year-old man named Scott standing inside the comedy club behind the glass doors and windows, totally locked inside. When the officers got him out, he explained that he had gotten really drunk at last night’s Medicine Hat show and had passed out on the toilet. When he woke up at 5am, the club was empty, the lights were off, and he was locked inside. He did try to leave the Bone after exiting the restroom but set off the security’s motion detectors and that’s when the alarm sounded and the police arrived.

Later in the show, Scott’s roommate phoned TnT to tell them that he had gotten home. He said that the police wouldn’t let him drive home from the Bone this morning because he blew a .16! Then Scott came to the phone and talked with TnT about the ordeal. He began by drinking Jaggermeister before the show and followed it up with a seemingly infinite supply of beers. He went on to say that he couldn’t remember most of the evening or how he got into the bathroom but assumed that he must have attempted a #2 before planning to go out to his truck to sleep it off. That’s when he passed out. Scott also said that he tried to call his brother and roommate to pick him up this morning but neither answered the phone so he had to call his mom. It was a hilarious story and was a topic of conversation throughout the entire show.

Black Tony joined TnT in studio this morning and during his visit the guys somehow got on the topic of child support. Tony told TnT of his very odd situation. Tony lives with his girlfriend, the mother of his son, but the two aren’t married. Somehow Tony has child support taken out of each of his paychecks. Then, several weeks later, that money is mailed to his girlfriend. Did I mention she lives in the same house as Tony? The gang spent some time trying to figure out how the whole thing came about. They took a handful of phone calls from people trying to explain it but for the most part, everyone seemed to agree that Tony’s girlfriend must have filled out some paperwork to set the wheels in motion for the child support.

As they continued discussing Tony’s story, his girlfriend phoned in. Immediately Tony yelled ‘’Why’d you file on me?’’ It was hilarious. After some talk, Tony’s girlfriend said that she did file paperwork for the child support when she had the baby years ago as sort of an insurance policy to make sure that if Tony were to bail on her and the child, she would at least get some cash from him. More phone calls came in and TnT continued discussing their thoughts that the State just doesn’t come after random people; paperwork must be involved ahead of time.

A news story about a woman bilking a drunken old man out of money spawned another lengthy discussion about finance today. The story morphed into an argument about whether or not Donnie could live for 40 years on $100,000. He seemed to think he could, while everyone else said it wouldn’t be possible. Donnie whipped out a calculator and tried to crunch the numbers, factoring in a trailer home and a vehicle as well as other expenses over a 40-year period. Imagine if you will a monkey with a Rubik’s cube. That’s Donnie with a calculator.

As the show progressed, the discussion of Donnie being able to live off of $100,000 for 40 years continued. Phone callers checked in with their thoughts and several e-mailers provided in depth financial analysis proving Todd and Tyler’s point of view. It was quite clear to everyone, with the exception of Donnie, that supporting yourself for 40 years on $100,000 just wouldn’t be possible yet Donnie still continued to argue that it was. It was embarrassing listening to Donnie but the mental image of a monkey with a Rubik’s cube helped me get over feeling bad for him.

J Medicine Hat from the Funny Bone stopped by the studio and spent some time hanging out with TnT. The guys filled him in on the story about the man who passed out at the Bone last night and J seemed to get a kick out of that. He was further amused when TnT told him that the police officers who checked out the alarm freaked out for a moment when they and Colleen walked through the Bone to make sure nothing was missing. While inspecting things, they officer spotted one of Medicine Hat’s blowup dolls and thought there was a second person in the comedy club. Hat went on to tell TnT about the new blowup doll, a fat girl inflatable.

Brian came in with an entertainment report later in the show. During the report Todd and Tyler continued discussing many of the topics from earlier in the show including child support, Donnie on finance, Medicine Hat’s blowup dolls and more. To conclude the e-news, Brian gave us yet another installment of the Nebraska Sex Offender Registry. That spawned a discussion about prisons and pedophiles, voting, gun ownership, and how difficult it is for former prisoners to gain entry into foreign countries.

The band Down To Here came in during the last hour of this morning’s show and performed a couple of tunes for TnT. They kicked the holy S-bomb out of ‘’War Pigs’’. If you missed them today you will be able to see them tomorrow at the Anchor Inn. They’re performing tomorrow night as part of the Battle of the Bands. It should be an awesome event so make sure to get out to the Anchor this weekend.

Well, that’s it for today’s update. Keep in mind that Todd and Tyler will be at the Anchor Inn tomorrow hosting the Battle of the Bands so stop on out and see them. If you happened to miss any of this morning’s show, it will air again on Sunday night at 10pm as the 3^rd Shift Replay. Todd and Tyler will return on Monday morning at 5:30am to being a new week of shows so get up early and join them. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-