Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Monday 11-25-02

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning by talking about yesterday’s building implosion downtown. They read a few quotes from the paper, which came from people who showed up to watch the demolition. Both Todd and Tyler seemed amused by some of the stupid things people said. One of which was a guy who said something to the effect of, ‘’It was like watching a big screen TV.’’ TnT then moved on to talk about how ironic it was that not only was the purposely-demolished building taken down but so was the one right next to it, quite by accident. That building happened to be the home and business place of the biggest opponent of the demolition to begin with.

Also early in the show, TnT got a call from Joe Blue House. The band played at a fundraiser over the weekend and Joe told TnT that one of the items up for auction during the silent auction was a lunch with Travis. The initial bid was supposed to be $50 but after no one placed a bid, it was dropped to just $5. Joe, feeling sorry that no one wanted to go to lunch with Trav, tossed I a pity bid of $20. To his surprise, he actually ended up wining the lunch date with Travis. TnT enjoyed the story greatly and brought it up with Travis when he arrived later in the show with his sports report. No official date has been set for the Travis and Joe lunch date but I’m sure we’ll get a full report when the time comes.

BW came in with the news today but his newscast wasn’t nearly as entertaining as the conversations TnT had about things they did over the weekend. Tyler gave us some details of what it’s like having sex with a pregnant woman, concluding his story with, ‘’It was cool.’’ BW shared a hilarious story about his $330 ‘’I need this’’ shopping trip to Sam’s Club. He then talked about looking for a puppy dog over the weekend, as he’s quite lonely in the haunted haven in Bennington without the company of a female. A listener phoned in and offered BW a free dog, which he seemed interested in. And when it became Todd’s turn to share a tale, he told us about his trip to the store to purchase Big Bob’s Vaginal Sponge tampons for his wife. When he arrived, he really couldn’t remember what he was supposed to get so he selected a box of green tampons, because he likes green. Well, Todd’s choice of green actually correlated to the ‘’super absorbent’’ kind of tampon, which his wife gave him a bit of a hard time about when he arrived home with her supplies.

After the news, TnT received a phone call from a guy who told them a lengthy story about some problems he was having with a girlfriend. As the story goes, he began dating a woman who wouldn’t fess up to seeing him because she had also been seeing another man for several years and didn’t want her religious family to freak out on her. Eventually, the caller got the woman pregnant and shortly thereafter, the two arranged for an abortion. Following that, the couple broke up. Angered by the whole situation, he went to the Council Bluffs Wal-Mart where the woman worked, got on the intercom, and said something like, ‘’Attention Wal-Mart shoppers, so-and-so broke up with me and had an abortion to cover up the fact that she was dating two guys.’’ The caller read the article from the CB newspaper that detailed his actions and the following arrest. It was rather interesting to hear but Todd and Tyler really couldn’t figure out why the guy had called them. He wasn’t really looking for any sort of trained counseling or advice, he just wanted to tell them about his revenge and carry that revenge on further by telling all of Omaha about what he did.

Travis came in with the sports report a little later in the show. As he read through his list of stories, TnT talked about each. They then discussed yet another blown Lock of the Week, taking a phone call from a listener who’s been betting against Trav’s picks for two years and is very pleased with his turnout. From there, Travis and the guys got into a lengthy discussion about the skylines of Omaha, Lincoln, and Des Moines. Tyler wanted to put a bullet in his head but due to the extra use his Winslow 2000 sound effect machine had gotten earlier in the show with all of the talk of buildings being demolished, the Winslow 2000 went on the fritz. Todd even got his hands on a list of the top 100 skylines in the world, reading over the top 10. Luckily for Tyler, the Winslow 2000 fixed itself, after repeatedly being banged on by Tyler, and Tyler was able to end the conversation with countless gunshots.

The guys spoke to a frequent e-mailer named Kent on the phone this morning. He told the guys about a hit-and-run accident that occurred in a parking lot downtown over the weekend to his wife’s car. When she came back to her car and saw that it had been hit, she also noticed a note from the guy who did it, leaving his name and phone number as well as explaining that he has insurance. Kent told TnT that he had been trying to get in touch with the guy but was having no luck. He then passed along the guy’s voice mail number to TnT so they phoned him. The voice mail TnT left for the guy was cordial. They thanked him for doing the right thing and admitting what he did but then scolded him for dodging Kent’s phone calls. They jokingly said they’d sick all of the news station’s investigative reporters on his ass if he didn’t get back to Kent.

Not too long after that, Kent phoned TnT back and said the man had been listening, heard the voice mail, and then phoned Kent to tell him to have TnT stop talking about it on the air. The man then dropped the ‘’jackass’’ bomb on Kent and hung up. TnT decided they’d phone the guy back and leave him another voice mail and on this one, they weren’t quite as nice as before. I believe they returned the ‘’jackass’’ bomb and mentioned once again that if the guy didn’t get in contact with Kent, they’d sick the investigative reporters on him. Perhaps we’ll get some follow-up on this story tomorrow so stay tuned.

Midget Brian is going to be speed dating at Brewsky’s tonight so he stopped in the show this morning to let the ladies get to know him. After describing himself and what type of woman he is interested in (an alive one), TnT opened the phones. There wasn’t a lot of response at first but eventually several ladies checked in via the phone and/or e-mail and filled 3 spots for tonight’s dating activities. Even though Midget Brian only had three confirmed dates, he was quite pleased that he beat BW’s record of 1 date set a few weeks ago. All of you ladies should keep in mind that the Z Staff will be recruiting daters for Midget Brian with a vengeance this evening out at Brewsky’s so if you were a little intimidated to call the show this morning, just swing out to the bar tonight for the Monday Night Football party and you can date Midget Brian!

While we’re on the topic of speed dating, Hilary (a.k.a. the smallest mammal ever to have given birth) stopped in today. TnT asked her whether or not she had spoken to any of the men she speed dated last Monday night. Much to their disappointment, she said that she hadn’t called any of the guys back yet. TnT asked her why, she replied with the old ‘’I’m playing hard to get’’ line, and then TnT made her phone one of the men she dated on the air. I didn’t catch his name but he was the first guy she dated last Monday. After talking to him about their date, TnT discussed the guy’s flute playing abilities and eventually got around to asking him out for Hilary. He sounded quite up for the date, which I believe will be taking place tonight at Brewsky’s. So everyone who’s headed out to the MNF party tonight, stare and point at the couple and leave Midget Brian alone to weave his web of seductive magic.

BW returned later in the show with the entertainment news. It began with a story about Paula Poundstone, which landed Brian a verbal scolding from TnT, both sick of hearing about her. Brian then gave a Mellencamp concert review and bitched about the bad tickets he received for free. Following that, the gang played another exciting round of ‘’Who The Hell Is That’’ with the celebrity birthdays and then discussed racking up miles on adopted 16-year-old Korean girls. The e-news concluded with a great baby-selling story, which prompted the question, ‘’Why can’t people sell babies?’’ Discussion over just that question then followed.

Well, that’s the big Monday update. Make sure to stop out at Brewsky’s tonight for the Monday Night Football party with Todd and Tyler. Bring a clean adult or child’s coat with you tonight as a donation in order to qualify for the Best Buy TV give-away, or you could also sign up to speed date Midget Brian. Tune in at 10pm for the 3^rd Shift Replay of this morning’s show and make sure to rejoin Todd and Tyler tomorrow at 5:30am for the Tuesday program. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-