Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Wednesday 2-5-03

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning with a little talk about tonight’s dodge ball game in Logan Magnolia. With this year being their farewell tour, the guys are pondering what they might do in place of dodge ball next year, if anything. They heard that the Logan Magnolia school has a pretty decent wrestling program so they wondered whether or not the Todd and Tyler Traveling Wrestling All Stars might be a good substitute for next year’s January doldrums. In order to see if they could fill a roster of wrestlers, the guys went through their current dodge ball roster and tried to categorize each teammate based on their weight. Not knowing the exact weight of everyone, TnT speculated on some and phoned others to get more exact figures. It appeared that they had a bunch of people for the lightweight end of the weight class spectrum and a ton of guys for the heavyweight classes but not many in the middle. They continued brainstorming about the possibility of a TnT wrestling team next year throughout this morning’s show.

Also early in today’s program, TnT read over an e-mail from a listener who asked them some relationship advice. Basically, the guy said he’s friends with a woman and she’s going to be divorced soon. He wants to nail her but is worried it might f-bomb up their friendship. TnT advised the guy to go ahead and put it in, as you can always make more friends. From there, Todd and Tyler had a lengthy discussion about a story Trisha Meuret from Channel 7 did last night. Her story was about a hooker who is in prison for life for the murder of another hooker. The jailed ex-ho wants a liver transplant and is trying to get herself put on the list of possible recipients for when a good liver comes up. People are up in arms about this, some saying that she shouldn’t be put on the list because she’s a murderer while others say that she’s a human just like everyone else and deserves as much of a chance at a life as anyone. TnT played devil’s advocate on both sides of the issue, going back and forth about the moral and social implications of whatever is decided.

BW came with today’s newscast and joined in on Todd and Tyler’s hooker liver talk for a bit. He then read over today’s news stories and jabbered with TnT about whatever else came up. They discussed hotties getting shocked by electric eels, there was some discussion of the Columbia tiles, TnT discussed a story about how 70 percent of all cancers are brought on by people and their lifestyle choices, there was some talk of grape assembly lines and Spaniards, and BW wrapped up today’s newscast with an uplifting story of a man decapitating his mother.

After the newscast, Todd and Tyler fired up their connection to everyone’s favorite medical professional, Dr. Ed Dominguez. To start, the gang brought up the hooker liver story and continued their analysis of the moral, ethical and social impact of the situation. They then opened up the phone lines to the listeners who pounded the doc with questions about internet Cass County cocktail drug mixtures, violent sperm, chunky sperm, transparent fecal matter, super high fevers, preconditioning young kids not to pee the bed, and inward ejaculations. Also during his visit with the guys, Tyler tried to get the doc to give the go ahead on rimming but Dr. Ed took the professional point of view and said that licking your lover’s butthole probably isn’t the best way to avoid disease.

The gang also talked with Dr. Ed about the Columbia shuttle crash. He was not in Texas when it occurred, he was actually in Omaha for some sort of social function. Anyway, much of the debris has fallen all over the part of Texas Dr. Ed lives in, as well as into Louisiana and according to more recent reports, even over parts of California and Arizona. He discussed the false reports that have been running rampant all over his state and told TnT that the schools in his town were closed on Monday for inspection to make sure no toxic debris had fallen there that could affect the kids. He also told the guys that a Dr. buddy of his had taken some of the photos of the crashing shuttle that have appeared all over the newspapers and weekly magazines in recent days. Dr. Ed will be rejoining the guys in a couple of weeks.

Travis came in with the sports report a little later in the show. He told TnT he spoke to Ahman Green yesterday about the retraction the former Husker demanded. Trav explained to the Packer that he just reported what had come down the AP wire. Ahman then said he didn’t know he was supposed to call the police immediately after the incident but did phone them the following day to get everything all taken care of. Basically, Trav said he and Ahman made up and got everything all worked out. That about did it for sports.

Larry the Cable Guy checked in this morning with his plans to help the Middle East peace process that he thought of while being rubbed down by a mother-daughter retard massage team. We’ll here more from Larry as the week moves on.

Todd and Tyler continued their discussion about tonight’s dodge ball game in Logan Magnolia. They figured that because they’d have a little extra time before the game, they’d swing in to a local bar for a drink before their scheduled event. They went to the web for a map of the area and spent some time discussing the geography of the Logan Magnolia area. Many listeners who will be attending tonight’s game checked in to fill them in on the existence of a town called Pigeon and another called Hard Scratch while others phoned in to invite them to one of the 5 bars in the town. By the end of the show, a report of one bar having Todd and Tyler on their marquee had come in so it sounded like TnT’s All Stars will be headed to Docs. By the way, more than 450 advanced tickets have been sold for the 900-seat event tonight. Get there early for the 5:30 ‘’some food’’ feed and make sure to get your spot in the gym for tonight’s match.

BW returned later in the show with today’s e-news segment. During this time, the gang discussed Courtney Love ‘’our favorite whore’’, there was some talk about the increasing amount of sexual situations shown on broadcast TV, BW did a gripping story about the possibility of new flavors being introduced to the Lifesaver candy, the gang discussed a ‘’Ranked’’ list of the top 10 sexiest moments in music, Brian did ‘’Who the hell is that?’’ and BW wrapped up the e-news with a story about a urine poaching Louisiana man getting busted for hiding out in the women’s bathroom of a Dillards collecting pee from the toilets.

Well, that does it for the Wednesday update. If you’re in the Logan Magnolia area tonight, swing out and see the Todd and Tyler Traveling Dodge Ball All Stars. To everyone else, tune in at 10pm tonight for the 3^rd Shift Replay of this morning’s show and make sure to rejoin TnT tomorrow at 5:30am for the Thursday program. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-