Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Wednesday 4-9-03

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning with some talk about last night’s HBO special on Crank. TnT didn’t get to see it because there were other things of interest but Jeremy watched the show and came into the studio with a rundown of the Iowa crank heads featured. Several listeners who watched it checked in as well. The gang then played a round of ‘’AMC What Was I Watching?’’, which featured a film full of transvestites with De Niro. TnT also spent some time pondering how we can get precise images of Baghdad from 30,000 feet in the sky from a tiny satellite camera but criminals shown on store surveillance tape always look like Etch-A-Sketch drawings.

Also early this morning, TnT spent some time talking about the war in Iraq. Like all of the other handlers and minders, Baghdad Bob, as the Iraqi Minister of Information is now known, didn’t show up for work today. The gang reiterated that the local news channels attempts to cover the war are horrible and they should stick to covering local stories, leaving the real news to the big boys. And while on the subject of TV news, the gang mentioned that Channel 3 rose in the ratings from a 3 to a 7 share, a significant rise in viewers. Although they’re still in 3^rd place, TnT both agreed that they must be doing something right over there with all of their recent changes and additions within the last year or so, so Channel 3 should keep it up. They then pondered aloud how in the hell the Channel 6 news still wins in the ratings, citing the ultra slowness to their production.

BW came in with the news a bit later in the show. Before he dove into it, he shared a lengthy tale about a run-in his sister had with a Glenwood police officer recently. He told a story about how one of the local officers dropped an F-bomb on her in front of her kid while she was poking around a crime scene. Brian’s sister considered turning in the officer but screwed herself when she too dropped an F-bomb back in front of her own kid. After that gripping tidbit of the Huston Family Saga, the gang moved on to discuss Cher’s appearance on TV last night, BW read a list of the top 10 most popular baby names in Nebraska (Emma and Jacob being #1), and the guys spent some time discussing helmet laws for motorcycle enthusiasts. BW then concluded the news segment with a story about a 300-pound Corky in a Batman suit who was beat to death with bottles of soda by a bunch of teenage thugs. The story made me physically ill.

Marsha Wallace and Starla Bedford from this weekend’s production of ‘’The Vagina Monologues’’ at the Rose Theater joined TnT in studio this morning for a little pie talk. The two discussed the stage production, some of the dialogue one is likely to hear, the types of people who attend the show, and much more. Contrary to popular belief, the show is not a man bashing show; men are welcome to come with their wives/girlfriends. The actresses talk about pie as a metaphor and literally, mentioning that there are several on-stage orgasms. Marsha was also on the 70’s ‘’Newhart’’ show and plays the voice of Edna Krabappel, the teacher on ‘’The Simpsons’’. She openly talked with TnT about both rolls.

At one point in the conversation with the ‘’Vagina Monologues’’ ladies, Todd asked, ‘’Do you have people who follow you from town to town? Are there ‘vagina heads’?’’ It was hilarious! Marsha and Starla were great with the guys this morning and seemed to enjoy their time on the show. For information about the production, visit http://www.vaginamonologues.com or visit the theater’s web site at The Rose - Performing Arts for Children and Families. You can also call 345-4849 for tickets, which range from $27 to $40. The play has 7 shows and will run through the weekend.

Travis came in with the sports report a bit later in the show. The guys started out by talking with Trav about Channel 3’s increase in ratings. They then moved on to discuss his daughter taking acting lessons. From there, they discussed Cher’s appearance on TV last night. Travis must have caught a bad case of gay because he said something to the effect of, ‘’Could you imagine Billy in makeup and a wig dressed like Cher?’’ It was creepy. The gang then spent some time sharing their pooping habits with us all, something they referred to as, ‘’The Asshole Monologues’’. Disturbing as it was, it was still rather humorous picturing Tyler having to walk off the track at his gym to poop, Trav’s daily 9:45am ritualistic poop, and once again imagining Todd firing off a ‘’productive tester’’ in the shower. Oh yea, Travis did sports today, too. The highlights? East German finger-long clitorises being used as putters.

Larry the Cable Guy checked in today. His neck buddy Dewayne is embedded with the military over in Iraq and this morning Larry read Dewayne’s account of some recent activity. Evidentially, Dewayne’s been putting fire crackers in the pee holes of dead Iraqi soldiers, picking up Iraqi whores, and peeing off the side of tanks. We’ll here more from Larry as the week moves on so stay tuned.

BW returned later in the show with today’s e-news segment. As he read this morning’s report, the gang was watching CNN in the background. There were a bunch of Iraqis in Baghdad attempted to pull down a huge statue of Saddam, yet they seemed to be having some trouble with it. Eventually, after getting some help from the Marines and a tank, they were able to bring it down. Cheers erupted all over Baghdad and in the Z studio. It seemed to be a monumental moment in history, perhaps like when the Berlin Wall came down. Who knows. And before wrapping up their show this morning, Brian spent some time going over a pop culture quiz with Todd, Tyler, Jeremy, and James the Giant Peach. It was full of interesting questions, way to many to detail here. The guys didn’t finish all of the questions today so perhaps we’ll here more from the pop culture quiz tomorrow.

Well, that does it for the Wednesday update. Tune in tonight at 10pm for the 3^rd Shift Replay of this morning’s show and make sure you rejoin the guys tomorrow at 5:30am for the Thursday edition. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-