Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Wednesday 4-16-03

Todd and Tyler began their show this morning with a little talk about the weather. Even though it was raining when the guys came into work this morning, they both agreed that a little rain is better than 40mph winds. TnT then commented on how the spring and fall seasons have seemed to disappear over recent years, which sucks. The guys then read over an e-mail response from a listener regarding yesterday’s swapping/3-some sex conversation. The e-mailer said she and her man swap with a couple all the time and it works out well for them, although she could see how such a sexual relationship might not be for everyone. The guys then read over a second e-mail on the subject. This e-mailer, a man, seemed to be offering up himself and his woman for swapping with Todd and Tyler, an intriguing thought but something that’s probably not going to happen if TnT’s wives have anything to say about it.

Also early in the show, TnT played a hate voice mail from an angry lady. She was pissed at TnT for their comments yesterday about the picture of the National Guard guys waving the Husker flag in Iraq. It was clear that she hadn’t heard what TnT said herself because if she had, she would have realized that Todd and Tyler have been supporting the troops from day 1 and what they said yesterday about the photo was right on the money. Yesterday’s conversation revolved around the fact that Todd and Tyler didn’t think it was appropriate for the soldiers to be waving a college football team’s flag IN THE MIDDLE OF A SERIOUS WAR. They pointed out that perhaps the US flag, the flag of one of the armed forces branches, the POW-MIA flag, hell, even a state flag would be more appropriate in the situation and contrary to popular believe, the Husker flag is not the state flag! They opened up the phone lines and listeners checked in on the subject. Most, even the military guys who voiced their thoughts, agreed with TnT 100%.

BW came in a bit later in the show with today’s news. The guys discussed a report of a flag being burned in front of an Omaha police station and how it only took the police 5 days to notice that their flag was missing and was burned up in their parking lot. They then moved on to discuss chained up Iowa kids, night crawler population control techniques, and BW did a story about 30,000 live chickens in California meeting their fate 1 by 1 via a giant wood chipper. BW also read over a story about a possible fetus stuck in a sewer pipe that featured Matt Higgins from TnT’s father’s rights law firm Cohen, Vacanti, Higgins, and Shattuck. He phoned in to talk about the story. Basically, his girlfriend was having some sewer trouble and when the fix-it guy came out and ran a camera down the line, there appeared to be either a dead animal or a 26-week old fetus stuck in the pipe. The police were called in and 5 hours later, it was determined not to be a fetus. The story was weird and Matt’s involvement in it was even weirder.

Towards the end of the news, Todd and Tyler were joined by Dr. Ed. He spoke with TnT about his recent trip to Mexico City and reported that there were a lot of anti-war and anti-American protests going on in the streets while he was there. His hotel was even surrounded by armed and armored police officers. The guys then spent the remainder of their time with the doctor discussing medical issues and taking phone calls. The subjects touched on this morning included SARS, herbs that help with boners, new laws that protect information about medical records, the dynamics of female ejaculations, different types of pie lubricants, itchy pie syndrome, perma-nips, and much more. The Dr. also gave some spooge-related advice after a listener phoned in asking about how to get his wife pregnant. The caller proclaimed, ‘’I’ve been sperming in her almost a year now.’’ Dr. Ed’s reply was something to the effect of, ‘’That’ll do it.’’

Also during the Doc’s time with TnT, they played a couple of audio clips from the current health guy over on 7, Dr. Ray Romano. The clips featured the 7 theme music with Jose telling people that smoking is good for you, clogged arteries are no big deal, crack can be fun, and at one point, he referred to Julie Cornell as a ‘’hot little momma’’ (or something to that effect). Dr. Ed enjoyed them all thoroughly, as did TnT. Dr. Ed also told the guys that he’ll be returning to Omaha next week to speak at Creighton so he might be swinging into the studio on Thursday for a quick visit. Tune in for the reunion.

Todd and Tyler went into their gas chamber again this morning and after mentioning today’s Coalition Artist of the Day, they gave us the number of songs to listen for by ripping off the appropriate number of ass biscuits. Listen today for your chance to win a $500 gas card from Todd and Tyler and if you don’t win today, tune in tomorrow when the guys will head back into their gas chamber.

Travis came in with the sports report a bit later in the show. He touched on the sporting news, including the Lancers upcoming Clark Cup matches with Lincoln. Travis also talked a bit about his ‘’For What It’s Worth feedback that he aired last night. Most of the people who called to bitch about Travis seemed to focus more on a simple geographical error he made instead of his opinions on the subjects of the day.

Patrick Spring from the Funny Bone phoned TnT from Wisconsin this morning before he headed out via crappy car for his appearance at the Bone tonight. He didn’t have much to say, as TnT pointed out they’ve noticed from him the last few times he called, but they’ll be bringing him into the studio on Friday morning nonetheless. Call the Bone Phone at 493-8036 for reservations to see Patrick Spring this week.

Todd and Tyler did a little trained counseling for a man named Ronnie this morning. He phoned the guys and asked their opinion on whether he should be worried about his girlfriend cheating on him. He told them a story about how she recently went out to the boats with a female friend of hers over the weekend and she didn’t call him that evening to tell him she got home okay. He did get in touch with her the next day, though. TnT decided to call Ronnie’s girlfriend, Jasmine, and ask her if she’s nailing someone else. When she joined the conversation, it was quite clear right from the start that she did not cheat on the guy. She was very apologetic and truly felt bad for not calling him but according to her report, got home really late and just didn’t want to wake him up. She also didn’t call him right away t he next day because she had to take her kid to a volleyball game. TnT counseled the couple quite well and, in the end, they fixed the couple all up.

BW returned later in the show with today’s e-news segment. He spent some time focusing on changes in the television world, which may include the cancellation of ‘’The Practice.’’ Then, out of nowhere, Donnie Dodge’s voice came on the air. Seconds later, Tyler started talking about watching wrestling! The apocalypse is here! SAVE YOURSELVES!!!!