Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Thursday 6-19-03

Todd and Tyler started off their show this morning with a little talk about the Whaler’s concert at the Anchor Inn last night. There was quite a bit of ‘’off the record’’ talk, as references to allegedly smoking giant blunts with a trombone player filled the early morning discussion. From everyone’s account, it was a great concert and fun was had by all. And because everyone had fun, the guys were a little hung over this morning. Breaking tradition, they actually came right out and begged for food to be delivered to the studio. It was pretty funny. A listener, I didn’t catch the name, was kind enough to bring the guys some fuel for their belly fires shortly after.

Also early, the guys spent some time talking about a variety of ‘’chick’’ magazines they have recently purchased. Of course, every magazine is ‘’the sex issue’’ so the guys referred to today’s show as ‘’the sex show’’. They took a few moments to share some headlines from the magazine’s covers and ended up focusing on one article about sexy things women do without knowing it. After scanning through the ads at the beginning of the rag and finally finding the table of contents, they got to the article and read over a few of the items discussed. They seemed generally unimpressed with the content of the article and felt rather mislead by the cover.

Before BW came in for the news, TnT whipped out the new Tony Bologna effort, ‘’Should Have Known Better’’. The song was about Grasshopper Takeover’s van that was stolen. After initially ripping what they expected to be another crappy Bologna song, they played the tune and were kind of impressed by it. The song was, of course, in typical Tony Bologna style with dubbed over voices, whistles, and I swear I heard a Jew’s harp but there was no kazoo, the lyrics were actually pretty funny, and the song didn’t suck ass overall.

BW joined the guys with the news a bit later. The gang discussed a 20-year-old that was busted for a consensual humping session with a 14-year-old Nebraska girl he met on the Internet. The guy had to pay a fine of $1000 and received no jail time. The story begged the question, ‘’Was it worth it?’’ The gang then moved on to discuss damage done to a J. Doe statue, there was talk of the Michigan riots, a lady gave birth to a house, and the guys talked about a 12-year-old kid who was swept away by a flood.

As the news continued, the gang spent quite a bit of time talking about a news story of a Palmyra man named Rex that allegedly used baited animal traps in his yard to catch dogs and cats, which would then mysteriously end up dead on the road in front of his house. The guy is a village board chairman for his small town, which made the story even more odd. Figuring the guy is just a sick pud, TnT opened up their phone lines to anyone with further details about the story or the man involved. TnT weren’t surprised to conclude that after receiving quite a few calls from listeners who know Rex personally, no one really seemed to like the guy.

Following the news, TnT continued their chick magazine discussion. They brought in Jessica Dol for a lady’s point of view. The gang discussed several articles during her visit, focusing mostly on the 8 hottest moments in a relationship. Some of the things from that list include the first time you know for sure you’re going to have sex with someone, the first time you actually stick it in, and the joys of simultaneous orgasms. Travis even joined in on the sex talk and from what I could gather just by listening, he seemed to really be into the simultaneous orgasm thing, too. ‘’I don’t understand how it could not happen every time’’, he said. Later, Travis delivered this morning’s sports report and the guys discussed his FWIW commentary from last night, which was about the teenage kid who killed his friends in a car accident and still wouldn’t claim responsibility for his actions.

Jungle Jack Hannah phoned Todd and Tyler today to talk about animals. He was checking in from his vacation spot in Montana somewhere (I think). Jack began the conversation by talking about a bull he had running loose in his neighbor’s yard that was eating cherry trees. He then went on to discuss renting chickens and goats from his neighbor and how he had gotten financially screwed in the deal. Later, with talk of Todd’s upcoming camping trip to the neck of the woods Jack is in, the guys talked about bears and bear repellant. Jack then shared a tale about getting some of the repellant on his throck after testing out his equipment, which was downright hilarious. Before ending the call, Jack talked with TnT about some Travel Channel specials he recently filmed, one of which airs tonight (I believe).

J Medicine Hat stopped by this morning and hung out with Todd and Tyler for a bit. He shared more details about his recent 3-some involving himself, his wife, and a redneck ‘’Chinese’’ hooker they bought one evening. TnT seemed amused when Hat told them that the following morning, after a night of pounding and pizza, J and his wife got up and went to church with his mother-in-law. Medicine Hat joined in on the other subjects of the morning and seemed to have a good time hanging out with the guys. He may be back tomorrow morning so tune in. Also, keep in mind that Medicine Hat is doing a teen show at the Funny Bone this Sunday at 4pm. All proceeds will go to the Big Brothers Big Sisters organization. Call the Bone Phone at 493-8036 for information.

The guys from Grasshopper Takeover joined Todd and Tyler in studio today. Before playing a couple of songs of their own, TnT played them the new Tony Bologna clip about their van being stolen. They got a kick out of it and thought of putting it up on their web site. After sharing more of the van recovery story, the guys also talked with TnT about a recent trip to L.A., where they played famous clubs such as the Whisky and The Viper Room. You can catch Grasshopper Takeover and their returned equipment at the Ranch Bowl on Friday evening. Also, feel free to check out their web site at Grasshopper Takeover.

BW returned later in the show with the e-news. He began with some news about the upcoming Gay Rodeo, which will be taking place at the Sarpy County Fairgrounds in Springfield on June 28^th and 29^th. The guys then spent some time talking about kicking the asses of retarded children in the Special Olympics, they moved on to talk about how Bruce Willis doesn’t mind if Kelso is banging Demi, there was some talk about old porn and Simon & Garfunkle (unrelated), and they talked more about a Glenwood man that was busted for holding a Vietnamese man hostage on a bridge (an earlier news story). They actually got a call from the man who spotted the incident and phoned police for help. To wrap up the e-news and the show for the day, nothing could have fit better than a story about a Florida man who was busted for twisting off onto senior citizen’s Meals On Wheels.

Well, that does it for the Thursday update. If you missed today’s show, you can catch it re-airing tonight at 10pm as the 3^rd Shift Replay. Keep in mind that Todd and Tyler are out of town next week and the guys will only be on until 9am tomorrow so make sure to join the guys bright and early at 5:30am what I’m sure will be enough of a Todd and Tyler fix to get us all through the doldrums of next week. Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-