Todd and Tyler Unauthorized Forums

Tuesday 7-8-03

Todd and Tyler started their show this morning by discussing a variety of things. Tyler took his buddy Mick to the Royals game last night, which helped to confirm that the stands are practically empty for regular, non-firework games. This led the guys into a brief discussion about how they feel the Royals need to have a smaller AAA park than what they currently use, something more along the lines of what Lincoln currently has. Tyler then shared details about a whacked dream he had where he was doing a radio show outside, Todd was supposed to be with him but wasn’t, and J Medicine Hat was cooking up a bunch of crank during the broadcast. Stating once again their beliefs that not all dreams have meaning, unlike what their dream expert lady would have you believe, the guys passed the weird dream off as being alcohol induced.

The guys continued their early morning discussion by mentioning that the Iranian twins that are joined at the head both died during their separation surgery. They then talked about Trav’s FWIW commentary last night in which he asked whether or not OPPD is doing enough to get power back on to the countless households that are still without electricity. TnT found it rather funny that for anyone who would say OPPD is not doing enough didn’t have any power and therefore couldn’t watch Trav’s commentary in the first place.

The gang then got into a lengthy discussion about the music sharing program Kazaa, wondering how it works, how it’s different from what Napster was, and whether or not it’s legal. BW, thinking that because he paid for the service, was sure it was legal for him to download all the music files he wants. Not knowing he was talking out of his ass and that what he paid for was the banner-free, pop-up free version of the same ‘’free’’ software, he’s still breaking the law any time he downloads a music file. But isn’t talking out your ass what the show’s all about sometime?

And speaking of BW talking out of his ass, he delivered this morning’s newscast after the Kazaa talk. The topics covered this morning included more discussion of the power outage, falling TV towers, the state having no blood in it’s banks, pigs that died because it was too hot, and the Columbia space shuttle ‘’smoking’’ gun being confirmed as flying piece of foam debris. Also during the news segment, Todd and Tyler recreated the Dr. Sloan vasectomy commercial featuring a couple preparing to have sex. After getting the commercial’s script, Tyler took the roll of the man, Todd was the woman, and BW became the voice-over announcer. After a few practice runs, TnT’s version of the commercial, a rather gay-sounding ‘’oohh yea!’’ session, was committed to a hot button and was played a variety of times throughout the rest of this morning’s show. It was hilarious. If you missed it, don’t be surprised if that ends up as today’s promotional announcement for the Todd and Tyler show on Z-92 all day so you’ll get your chance to catch it.

After the news, the guys somehow got on the topic of testing the decency limits as they apply to the radio industry. As far as I can tell, this came up because BW mentioned that when he rides his Harley around, he carries with him a change of clothes so he doesn’t have to walk around wearing jeans and a black t-shirt all summer. Because there are times when he just has no alternative, BW often strips to his boxers in public and puts on his street clothes, packing up the ‘’Geranimals’’ and leaving them with his bike. The guys wondered if BW’s breaking any laws by getting down to his underwear and after some thought, they concluded that he probably wasn’t. After all, women wearing bikini swim suits are basically in the same attire as they would be if they had stripped down to their bra and underwear and nobody seems to have a problem with a bikini-clad lady walks around.

Taking this thought a little further, now bringing in the mentioned testing of the decency limits as they apply to radio, Todd and Tyler decided to offer up Z-Bash tickets to any female listener willing to come to the parking lot, strip to her bra and panties, and walk into the building to claim her free ticket prize. Referring to the decency test as Todd and Tyler’s Parade of Panties, the guys took calls from female listeners willing to participate. After getting a few calls from listeners saying that they were on their way, TnT began looking to the parking lot and noticed a swarm of work vans and other vehicles that normally aren’t there. Figuring all the cars were full of guy listeners who wanted a cheap thrill, they got conformation by asking over the radio that anyone in the parking lot who was there to see the female listeners win their prize to give a wave. Uproarious laughter exploded as arms shot out of cars all over the parking lot waving frantically. One of which may or may not have belonged to TnT’s boss, Wex, who mysteriously drove around the parking lot a handful of times searching for the perfect parking spot as he, too, awaited the arrival of the first lady.

The first to show up as a listener named Shelly. As TnT gave a play-by-play and countless others in the radio station peered through the window and into the parking lot, Shelly got out of her car, stripped to bra and panties and walked into the building. TnT brought her into the studio, gave her the free tickets and then sent her on her way. Although TnT were very kind to Shelly, stating she had to have a big set of nads to do what she did, others who witnessed the spectacle were a little less kind. In order to ‘’cleanse our pallets’’, the guys then brought in Jessica Dol to pretty up the studio a bit.

During Jessica’s visit with the guys, she talked about a recent trip to Alabama she had to visit a friend of hers. She got off on a tangent about how she really doesn’t like her girlfriend’s new husband, which opened up a can of worms and a lengthy discussion about similar situations Todd, Tyler, BW, Travis, and everyone else has found themselves in when it relates to either liking or being liked by the girlfriends of their buddies. Each shared a variety of stories and afterward, they all stressed how they weren’t referring to the ‘’current’’ of anyone in the studio; they all get along with everyone’s women now.

Travis delivered this morning’s sports report, which included more talk about Kobe Bryant and how the recent arrest for sexual assault might have something to do with a big shoe selling conspiracy. Trav then cut the sports report short, as the guys were expecting another Parade of Panty participant; this one sounding much more attractive to all.

The second Parade of Panties participant this morning was a listener named Crystal. This one was, as everyone could tell by her voice from her earlier call, very hot. In fact, she was swarmed by the parking lot full of male spectators as she stripped to her bra and panties and approached the Z building. One of the people that swarmed her was an older guy with a camera and as Crystal told TnT when she came into the studio for her tickets, the old guy is actually the father of her best friend! Creepy!

Todd and Tyler interviewed the new Editorial Director of Hustler magazine, Bruce David this morning. He talked with TnT about how Larry Flint has brought him back to work for the magazine after he left many years ago during Larry and Althea’s heroin-household-holdup stage (brilliantly depicted in the movie about Larry’s life). Noticing the effects of the Internet on magazine sales, Larry felt David might help to bring back some of the subscribers who have moved away from the magazine realm in favor of the plethora of free, downloadable Internet porn. David talked with TnT about some of the social/political things that are being added to the magazine, specifically about an attack on right wing talk show host Bill O’Reilly, TnT shared their childhood Hustler whacking memories with him, and David talked about some of the changes the magazine has gone through. All in all, it was an interesting interview but TnT seemed a bit disappointed that David wasn’t a ‘’sleazier guy’’.

BW returned later in the show with today’s e-news. He and Tyler’s baby daughter, Madison tag-teamed most of the report, which was pretty funny. The gang discussed how nut job talk show host Michael Savage was fired from his TV gig for some homophobic remarks he made to a caller, they moved on to talk about lightning at a Dave Matthews Band concert in Wisconsin, and there was some talk about how Ted Nugent’s house is going to have to be burned to the ground with flaming arrows because it’s infested with mold. The gang also discussed tooth fairy scams, David Lee Roth’s new album, today’s ‘’Who the hell is that’’ list, and BW read over some more useless trivia questions for the guys.

Before leaving the air, the guys had one more Parade of Panties contestant pull into the parking lot. Her name was Jamie, a ‘’Camel smoker’’ from BW’s account, and she just barely made it to the studio in time to participate before the end of the show. Jamie walked from her car to the studio as the other contestants did, dressed in just her bra and panties, in order to get free tickets to the Z-Bash.

Well, that does it for today’s update. Tune in tonight at 10pm for the 3^rd Shift Replay of this morning’s show and make sure to tune in tomorrow at 5:30am for the Wednesday program. Todd and Tyler’s Parade of Panties will continue all morning tomorrow with the first scheduled hottie to arrive around 5:45am. Don’t miss it! Thanks for watching. Good night. -Corby-