Best Songs about Record Companies

Dave

KingDick
Staff member
Normally, they're not positive reviews about the recording industry or music business in general :lol:

I can only think of 2 off the top of my head.

Workin' for MCA by Lynyrd Skynyrd:
View: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUpJlui_Y4I

Seven years of hard luck, comin' down on me
From the Florida border, yea up to Nashville Tennessee
I worked in every joint you can name, mister every honkytonk
Along come Mr Yankee Slicker, sayin' maybe you're what I want

(Chorus)
Want you to sign your contract
Want you to sign today
Gonna give you lots of money
Workin' For MCA

9000 dollars, that's all we could win
But we smiled at the Yankee Slicker with a big ol' Southern grin
They're gonna take me out to California gonna make me a superstar
Just pay me all of my money and mister maybe you won't get a scar

(Chorus)

Suckers took my money since I was seventeen
If it ain't no pencil pusher, it got to be a honkytonk queen
But I'll sign my contract baby, and I wan't you people to know
That every penny that I make, I'm gonna see where my money goes
 

Dave

KingDick
Staff member
It Ain't Gonna Suck Itself by Cracker (regarding Virgin Records, the song is actually a lot better than this live recording)
View: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TgpyrnkExNo


I say baby, it ain't gonna suck itself
Virgin Records, it ain't gonna suck itself
I say baby, it ain't gonna suck itself
What 'chew waiting for? it ain't gonna suck itself

Well I flew out from Virginie on the very first day
I heard my record company exercised my pay to play
Went to see Mr. Lott but his assistant said no
"Security will escort you to the parking lot"

It was 102 degrees I was feeling kind of hot
So I walked across the street for one of those Mexican frozen popsicles
Couldn't buy just one so I bought myself a box
When I come back the assistant she's standing in the parking lot

No hard feelings do you want one of these?
But she looks at me like I was speaking Chinese
The security man walks up he helps himself to one
Coincidently Chinese and hot from standing in the sun

Then he helps himself to another he puts it in her hand
But she looks at it like it was a piece of crap
Or a dead and dying bird she didn't understand
So I was just trying to be helpful when I said...

Baby, it ain't gonna suck itself
Oh Virgin Records, it ain't gonna suck itself
I beg to differ cousin, it should be, it ain't gonna lick itself
Ok we'll try it that way It ain't gonna lick itself

Well I'm standing in the parking lot waiting on my ride
His name is Jackson Haring and he's still inside
He went in through mailroom for some record company swag
But this Virgin Records there ain't shit to be had

And the halls they was empty because everyone was laid off
And he took a wrong turn ends up in the tape vault
Only one thing to do when you're standing face to face
With the Sticky Fingers, Let It Be master tapes

You've got to stick them in the satchel and head on the down the hall
Saying these will go nicely with that Residents eyeball
Many years ago while working for Bill Graham Presents
A prop eyeball was stolen backstage from The Residents

And the rumor went around that Jackson was the thief
But that's neither here nor there and I was sitting in the jeep
Looking at the Sticky Fingers master tapes
My popsicle's dripping on the seat so I throw it out the window
And it lands at the feet of Roy Lott

Hey Roy, it ain't gonna suck itself
Ah Virgin Records, it ain't gonna suck itself
And one time for the ladies, It ain't gonna lick itself
Ah Virgin Records, it ain't gonna suck itself

Baby, it ain't gonna suck itself
Everyone at Virgin Records, it ain't gonna suck itself
One for the ladies, it ain't gonna lick itself
What 'chew waitin' for, it ain't gonna suck itself

Mr. Lott, it ain't gonna suck itself
Everyone on Foothill Road, it ain't gonna suck itself
Just so we're not totally sexist, it ain't gonna lick itself
Virgin Records, it ain't gonna suck itself
 

Dave

KingDick
Staff member
Mike handed me the phone to let remind me of one of his favorite songs...

View: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8E_dkESwzg


Welcome to the big time. You\'re bound to be a star
This race is for rats, It can turn you upside down
And even if you don\'t go all the way, I know that you\'ll go far
Ain\'t no one you can count on in this sleazy little town
But don\'t you open your heart
Oh, no
Lots of promises in the dark

Chorus
The words that they say
Cause it don\'t mean nothin\'
These games that people play
Don\'t mean nothin\'
No, it don\'t mean nothin\'
It don\'t mean nothin\'
No victim, no crime
Till you sign it on that dotted line
The director smiles as you walk in the door

But you\'re just not what we\'re looking for
He says, "I love your work, babe"
It\'s never what but who it is you know
So easy to get stuck in all that California snow
Take a good look around and you\'ll find
People tryin\' to mess with your mind

Repeat Chorus
Make you the winner of a losing fight

But the party is never over
Hollywood can be so lonely
Cause stars are always shining
Doesn\'t matter if it\'s day or night

The producer says, "let me change a line or two"
And a little bit of something can look awfully good to you And you want to scream, but you gotta keep it all inside. When you\'re trying to make a living,
There ain\'t no such thing as pride, no
But don\'t you open your heart
Lot of promises in the dark
Repeat Chorus
 

Dave

KingDick
Staff member
Rolling Stones - Under Assistant West Coast Promo Man

"The Under Assistant West Coast Promotion Man was a good-natured jibe at George Sherlock, the London Records promo man who accompanied us on our first American tour."
View: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axeJ2JZf5eA


Well I'm waiting at the bus stop in downtown L.A.
Well I'm waiting at the bus stop in downtown L.A.
But I'd much rather be on a boardwalk on Broadway

Well I'm sitting here thinkin' just how sharp I am
Well I'm sitting here thinkin' just how sharp I am
I'm an under assistant west coast promo man, yeah, yeah

Well I promo groups when they come into town
Well I promo groups when they come into town
Well they laugh at my toupee, they're sure to put me down

Well I'm sitting here thinking just how sharp I am
Yeah I'm sitting here thinking just how sharp I am
I'm a necessary talent behind every rock and roll band

Yeah, I'm sharp, I'm really, really sharp
I sure do earn my pay, sitting on the beach every day
Yeah, I'm real real sharp, yes I am
I got a Corvette and a seersucker suit, yes I have

Here comes the bus, uh oh
I though I had a dime, where's my dime
I know I have a dime somewhere
I'm pretty sure
 
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